Hi John, Thanks for the article. From my personal experience, divorce was like experiencing a death. However, people around me did not extend the same help someone would receive if their spouse had died. Also, in some circles of friends I was further rejected because divorce was taboo. My mother realized this when my father died. She made a comment to me that made me realize that she now understood what divorce had done to me. A neighbor brought me a bag of groceries as she remembered her needs when she was first divorced. When someone experiences the pain and loss of divorce, wrap your arms around them and give them a hug with the words "I'm here for you, call when you need me". Do for them, what you would do for someone having experienced a death. Unfortunately, the hurt keeps on hurting if the former spouse is always in view....child visitations, seeing them around town, etc.

Hello Jennifer, This is Luella. Yes, you are correct, the only one responsible for our own happiness is ourselves. Knowing this and living it will make a breakup all the easier. Self esteem may also be involved. If you have a healthy self esteem, you will also fare better. Kindest regards, Luella May and John Elliott, aka Oaky Wood

Hello Mary, Thank you for dropping by. This is Luella. I will agree with you that John wrote a most excellent article. Kindest regards, Luella May and John Elliott, aka Oaky Wood

Hello Deborah, Yes, in the end, rejection will make you much stronger, but before you get to the end you have to go through a host of emotions. All these emotions can lead to self discovery and when thought of in this way can actually be a positive force. By the way, this is Luella responding. Kindest regards, Luella May and John Elliott, aka Oaky Wood

Hello Mary, I would agree with you that divorce would be worse than death, as divorce has the component of rejections. Either though, can leave you feeling overwhelmed and so very alone. The only saving grace would be when the divorce is mutually agreeable between the parties. I agree with you that someone going through a divorce needs lots of love and caring. I believe in today's society, many take divorce as just an every day occurrence. It is actually very emotional and it throws your world way of kilter. By the way, this has been Luella responding. Kindest regards, Luella May and John Elliott, aka Oaky Wood