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Sara Gardner 1245 5345 Burlin...	RE: Go Ahead! Laugh! You Know You Want To!. 1/19/2011 3:10:15 PM
	Quote: "Today, give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he sees all day." ~H. Jackson Brown, Jr.~ Hi Gaby, Thanks for stopping by with some more Funnies. You always know how to make me smile, and you know what they say... Thanks Again My Friend & Have A Terrific Day, Phil Thank you Phil, it is beautiful and I really appreciate getting to read this. Hugs, Sara

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Phillip

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Thomas...

RE: Go Ahead! Laugh! You Know You Want To!.

1/19/2011 4:37:05 PM

Hi Sara,

Thanks for coming by my Friend. I'm glad you liked the Quote. That's always been one of my favorites, as has this one...

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”

~Leo F. Buscaglia~

Just think of all of the lives in which in which we can possibly make a difference each and every day, just by sharing a Smile or a Kind Word. Thanks for taking the time to share part of your day with me. I appreciate it my Friend.

Have A Blessed Week,

Phil

“There may be trouble all around, but I am calling you to a place of peace. Be still and know that I am God. Come to Me, and I will give you wisdom, strength, and grace for everything you face." Psalm 46:10

Phillip 7317 5931 Thomas...	RE: Go Ahead! Laugh! You Know You Want To!. 1/21/2011 2:35:54 AM
	Hello My Friends, Here's a few more that I hoped you all might get a Chuckle ot two out of... Hard To Get Good Help The woman of the house decided to give their butler, Jeeves, the night off. She said they would be home very late, and that he should just enjoy his evening. As it turned out, however, the wife wasn't having a good time at the party, so she came home early, alone. Her husband had to stay, as several of his important clients were there. As the woman walked into her house, she saw Jeeves sitting by himself in the dining room. She called for him to follow her, and led him into the master bedroom. She then closed and locked the door. She looked at him and smiled. "Jeeves," she said. "Take off my dress." He did this carefully. "Jeeves," she continued. "Take off my stockings and garter." He silently obeyed her. "Jeeves," she then said, "Now, remove my bra and panties." As he did this, the tension continued to mount. She looked at him and then said, "Jeeves, if I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired!" _______________ A Lesson In Forgiveness The Preacher decided to preach his Sermon on Forgiveness, so he asked how many of the Congregation have forgiven their enemies? About half held up their hands. He then repeated his question. Now about 80 percent held up their hands. He then repeated his question. All responded, except one elderly lady. "Mrs. Jones, are you not willing to forgive your enemies?" "I don't have any." "Mrs. Jones, that is very unusual. How old are you?" "Ninety-three." she replied. "Mrs. Jones, please come down in front and tell the congregation how a person cannot have an enemy in the world?" She smiled and said, "I outlived every darn one of 'em" _______________ The Afterlife Three Italian nuns died and of course, went to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, they are met by St. Peter. He said "Sisters, you all led such wonderful lives that I'm granting you six months to go back to earth and be anyone you want to be." The first nun said, "I want to be Sophia Loren;" and poof she's gone. The second said, "I want to be Madonna;" and poof she's gone. The third said, "I want to be Sara Pipalini." St. Peter looked perplexed. "Who?" he said. "Sara Pipalini;" replied the nun. St. Peter shook his head and said; "I'm sorry, but that name just doesn't ring a bell." The nun then took a newspaper out of her habit and handed it to St. Peter. He read the paper and started laughing. He handed it back to her and said "No sister, the paper says it was the 'Sahara Pipeline' that was laid by 1,400 men in six months." _______________ And finally, a gentle Reminder that no matter what Life throws our way, we all just... Gotta Keep Going Life punches you in the stomach. It knocks your breath out and leaves you bowed and gasping. You must keep going. You lose a job, and wonder how you are going to find another. You must keep going. You find out you have a serious illness that will effect the rest of your life. You must keep going. You have a big argument with your spouse. Neither of you feels like talking and maybe not even looking at each other. You must keep going. Your children rebel and are on self-distructive courses. You must keep going. The bills seem to never end and the money seems to never start. You must keep going. There are times that make you just want to curl up, stick your head in a hole, and make the world go away. You must keep going. When you woke up this morning, for a variety of reasons, didn't feel like getting out of bed, but you had to. You must keep going. Life is full of those circumstances. In times like those, and when they come along, always remember the blessing. The blessing is not in that you must keep going. The blessing is that you can. _______________ Have A Wonderful Night My Friends, Phil
	“There may be trouble all around, but I am calling you to a place of peace. Be still and know that I am God. Come to Me, and I will give you wisdom, strength, and grace for everything you face." Psalm 46:10
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Mary Evelyn 23244 5352 Strawb...	RE: Go Ahead! Laugh! You Know You Want To!. 1/21/2011 5:22:15 PM
	Wow Phil this chicken joke is really getting popular. I was just now reading where it was posted here in this forum a couple of days ago but the first time I saw it was in Peter's joke thread on 1/13. Hope your weekend is going fantastic. :) Evelyn Deep in the back woods a hillbilly's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to-be a lantern and said, 'Here. You hold this high so I can see what I am doing!' Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world. 'Whoa there', said the doctor, 'Don't be in such a rush to put that lantern down I think there's another one coming..' Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered a baby girl. 'Hold that lantern up, don't set it down there's another one!' Said the doctor. Within a few minutes he had delivered a third baby 'No, don't be in a hurry to put down that lantern, it seems there's yet another one coming!' cried the doctor. The redneck scratched his head in bewilderment, and asked the doctor, . . . 'You reckon it might be the light that's attractin' 'em?'

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Gabrielle 833 4356 Sacram...	RE: Go Ahead! Laugh! You Know You Want To!. 1/21/2011 7:23:35 PM
	You may have it and not know it....... ADD KNOW THE SYMPTOMS.....PLEASE READ! Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder. Somehow I feel better even though I have it!! Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests: I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, And notice that the can is full. So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking. I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Pepsi aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. The Pepsi is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need water. I put the Pepsi on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill. Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do. At the end of the day: the car isn't washed the bills aren't paid there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter the flowers don't have enough water, there is still only 1 check in my check book, I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys. Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day, and I'm really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.... Do me a favor. Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember who I've sent it to. Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!
	God Bless Everyone
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