Hi Peter, Seems that once the jokes about ObamaCare start, they're just like a bad case of Diarrhea, they just keep coming...
Top Twenty Five Features of ObamaCare
"No Shirt, No Shoes, No Surgery"
1. Medical degrees from Devry. 2. Mandatory organ donor cards. 3. Lighters used to sterilize syringes. 4. Stomach stapling done at Office Max. 5. Coin operated morphine dispensers. 6. Tap water is a plasma substitute. 7. Homeless people all have only one kidney. 8. Free cremation with any major operation. 9. Bunkbeds in the Intensive Care Unit. 10. Your first dose of narcotics is free. 11. Special "showers" for the elderly. 12. Tongue depressors taste like Popsicles. 13. None of the nurses speak English. 14. The hospital cafeteria failed its health inspection. 15. Ambulances have meters. 16. Hospital walls are infested with "lab" rats. 17. Do-it-yourself heart bypass kits. 18. Wind up pacemakers. 19. You make up your own hospital bed. 20. Anesthesia comes in a bong. 21. Patients' meals are MREs. 22. Leeches make a comeback! 23. Hospital TVs are all turned to MSNBC. 24. Sears surgical tools.
25. A visit to the hospital will automatically cancel your life insurance policy.
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What are the ten best uses for the ObamaCare bill?
(Rated by our readers.)
1. Toilet paper 2. Bird cage liners 3. Kindling 4. Landfill 5. Spitballs 6. Paper shredders 7. Paper airplanes 8. Origami 9. Holes in dry wall 10. Doorstops *********************
********************* Popular Barack Obama Jokes
Q. Why won’t Obama laugh at himself? A. Because it would be racist.
Like any corrupt Chicago politician, Obama would frequently go the cemetery to register voters. One night he came across a grave so old and worn that he couldn't make out the name on the tombstone. The staffer holding the flashlight got impatient and suggested that they just move on to the next plot. Obama angrily exclaimed, "This person has as much right to vote as anyone else here!"
Obama Anagrams President Barack Obama = Arab base, pink Democrat President Barack Hussein Obama = A Democrat speaks inane rubbish
Q. What do Obama and Osama have in common? A. They both have friends who bombed the Pentagon.
Q. Why did Obama change his name from Barry to Barack? A. He thought Barry sounded too American.
Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Well, for example, the other day I went downtown and into a shop. I was only there for about 5 minutes, and when I came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I said to him, 'Come on, man, how about giving a retired person a break'? He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. I called him a 'Nazi.' He glared at me and wrote another ticket for having worn tires. So I called him a 'doughnut eating Gestapo.' He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he wrote a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I abused him the more tickets he wrote. Personally, I didn't care. I came downtown on the bus, and the car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said, 'I ♥ Obama.' I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired. It's important to my health.
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Feel That Warmth! Have A Great Weekend, Phil
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