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Peter 1470 7259 Lod	RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week 12/23/2010 4:23:03 PM
	Hi All, You don't want to screw with a Texan if you know what's good for you. :) Shalom, Peter TEXAS PREPARATION A guy cruises thru a stop sign, and gets pulled over by a local policeman. The guy hands the cop his driver's license, insurance verification, plus his concealed carry permit. "Okay, Mr. Smith," the cop says, "I see your CCW permit. Are you carrying today?" "Yes, I am." "Well then, better tell me what you got." Smith says, "Well, I got a .357 revolver in my inside coat pocket. There's a 9mm semi-auto in the glove box. And, I've got a .22 magnum derringer in my right boot." "Okay," the cop says. "Anything else?" "Yeah, back in the trunk, there's an AR15 and a shotgun. That's about it." "Mr. Smith, are you on your way to or from a gun range...?" "Nope." "Well then, what are you afraid of...?" "Not a D*** thing..."
	Peter Fogel Babylon 7
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Mary Evelyn 23244 5352 Strawb...	RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week 12/23/2010 7:13:09 PM
	I would like to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. May 2011 bring you lots of happiness and good health. Words for Women to Live By!! 1. Aspire to be Barbie - *the btch has everything. 2. If the shoe fits - buy them in every color. 3. Take life with a pinch of salt... A wedge of lime, and a shot of tequila. 4. In need of a support group? - Cocktail hour with the girls! 5. Go on the 30 day diet. (I'm on it and so far I've lost 15 days). 6. When life gets you down - just put on your big girl panties and deal with it. 7. Let your greatest fear be that there is no PMS and this is just your personality. 8. I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here. 9. Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself. 10. Don't get your knickers in a knot; it solves nothing and makes you walk funny. 11. When life gives you lemons in 2011- turn it into lemonade then mix it with vodka. 12. Remember where ever there is a good looking, sweet, single or married man there is some woman tired of his bull**! 13. Keep your chin up, only the first 40 years of parenthood are the hardest. 14. If it has Tires or Testicles it's gonna give you trouble. 15. By the time a women realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong. 'Good friends are like stars......... You don't always see them, but you know they are always there' 'Remember yesterday, dream about tomorrow, but live for today'. Now smile and send to any girl wasting time at work, suffering from a hangover, or just suffering from life , that might need a reason to smile!

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Peter 1470 7259 Lod	RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week 12/23/2010 11:18:12 PM
	Hi Evelyn, There are some very good ones in your last post. I have a feeling you might get a chuckle outta this one. Shalom, Peter Two elderly residents, a man and a woman, were sitting alone in the lobby of their nursing home one evening. * The old man looked over and said to the old lady, I know just what you're wanting, and for $5 I'll have sex with you right over there in that rocking chair." The old lady looked surprised but didn't say a word. The old man continued, "For $10 I'll do it with you on that nice soft sofa over there, but for $20 I'll take you back to my room, light some candles, and give you the most romantic evening you've ever had in your life." The old lady still says nothing but after a couple of minutes, starts digging down in her purse. She pulls out a wrinkled $20 and holds it up. "So you want the nice romantic evening in my room," says the old man. "Get serious." she said, "Four times in the rocker."
	Peter Fogel Babylon 7
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Peter 1470 7259 Lod	RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week 12/24/2010 7:25:57 AM
	Hi All, Since the MSM is still not reporting on the news but creating and telling you what they think the news is I thought it would be a good idea to give you all a more reliable news source to listen to and rely on. I've been planning to post these videos individually but due to off line responsibilities I had very little online time so here's a trio for your enlightenment and enjoyment. This will be a new feature of this thread as they are posted twice a week. Merry Christmas to all. Shalom, Peter http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fyHObWK7gkc http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UkS6jpCgOfs http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rz8H5PUkiqY
	Peter Fogel Babylon 7
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Peter 1470 7259 Lod	RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week 12/25/2010 5:38:11 AM
	Hi All, I had a good laugh reading this one and wanted to share it with you all. There is a moral to this story as I'm sure you'll see. Shalom, Peter A little boy comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores. "Not yet," said the little boy. His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he's a little pissed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken. He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig. He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal. "How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks. "Well," his mother says, "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I saw you kick the cow so for a week you aren't getting any milk." Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen. The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, "You gonna tell him or should I?"
	Peter Fogel Babylon 7
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