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RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week
12/22/2010 5:05:17 AM
Waitress Texas Style:

TRUE STORY FROM... "THE HOUSTON HERALD NEWSPAPER" IN HOUSTON , TEXAS
One Night Around Midnight, A Woman From Houston , Texas Was Arrested, Jailed, And Charged With Manslaughter For Shooting A Man 6 Times In The Back As He Was Running Away With Her Purse. ~
The Following Monday Morning, The Woman Was Called In Front Of the arraignment Judge, Sworn In, And asked to explain her actions.
The woman replied, "I was standing at the corner bus stop for about 15 minutes, waiting for the bus to take me home after work. I am a waitress at a local cafe.
I was there alone, so I had my right hand on my pistol, that was in my purse, that was hung over my left shoulder. All of a sudden I was being spun around hard to my left. As I caught my balance, I saw A man running away from me with my purse. I looked down at my right hand and I saw that my
fingers were wrapped tightly around my pistol.
The next thing I remember is saying out loud, "No Way Punk! You're not stealing my pay check and tips." I raised my right hand, pointed my pistol at the man running away from me with my purse, and squeezed the trigger of my pistol 6 times!
When asked by the arraignment judge, "Why did you shoot the man 6 times?
The woman replied, "Because, When I pulled the trigger the 7th time, It only went click."

The woman was acquitted of all charges. She was back at work at the cafe the next day!
Now that's Gun Control.... Texas Style
AMEN
God Bless Everyone
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Jim
Jim Allen

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RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week
12/22/2010 10:30:59 PM

May Wisdom and the knowledge you gained go with you,



Jim Allen III
Skype: JAllen3D
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RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week
12/22/2010 11:00:50 PM

A stark naked, drunken woman, jumped into a
vacant taxi at the King William Street rank.

The Indian driver was immediately beside himself and
just kept on staring at the woman. -- He made no attempt
to start the cab.

“What's wrong with you mate, haven't you ever seen
a naked white woman before?”
“I'll not be staring at you lady, I am telling you that
would not be proper where I am coming from".
"Well if your not bloody staring at me mate, what are you
doing then?"
"Well, I am telling you, I am thinking to myself
where is this lady keeping the money to be paying
me for the taxi ride."
God Bless Everyone
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RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week
12/22/2010 11:05:20 PM
He grasped me firmly but gently just above my elbow and guided me into a room, his room. Then he quietly shut the door and we were alone.

He approached me soundlessly, from behind, and spoke in a low,
reassuring voice close to my ear.

"Just relax."

Without warning, he reached down and I felt his strong, calloused
hands start at my ankles, gently probing, and moving upward along my calves slowly but steadily. My breath caught in my throat. I knew I should be afraid, but somehow I didn't care. His touch was so
experienced, so sure.

When his hands moved up onto my thighs, I gave a slight shudder, and partly closed my eyes. My pulse was pounding. I felt his knowing fingers caress my abdomen, my ribcage. And then, as he cupped my firm, full breasts in his hands, I inhaled sharply. Probing, searching, knowing what he wanted, he brought his hands to my shoulders, slid them down my tingling spine and into my panties.

Although I knew nothing about this man, I felt oddly trusting and
expectant. This is a man, I thought. A man used to taking charge. A
man not used to taking `no' for an answer. A man who would tell me
what he wanted. A man who would look into my soul and say ...

"Okay, ma'am, all done."

My eyes snapped open and he was standing in front of me, smiling,
holding out my purse. "You can board your flight now."
God Bless Everyone
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Peter Fogel

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RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week
12/23/2010 4:19:16 PM
Hi Gaby & All,
Gaby, your latest trio of jokes are hilarious and thanks for sharing them with us.
I'm sure all y'all will find this one absolutely hilarious.
Shalom,
Peter


Peter Fogel
Babylon 7
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