Well Bogdan, I guess it is time for you to be unhappy with me again as I am going to disagree with this Brian Tracy quote. While I have both met, and taken classes from Mr. Tracy and have a lot of respect for him, what he says here is incorrect. (And no, I am not being "argumentative" rather I'm striving for accuracy and truth. Which are two things I strive for on a constant basis.) It is totally illogical to take responsibility for understanding something which is not presented in such a way as to be understood. I have seen people not use the accepted definition of a word and still expect others to understand what they are attemping to convey. There are laws, instructions, regulations and legal documents written in such a way that it is nearly, if not totally, impossible to understand them. If someone speaks or writes to you in a language you do not know, how can your accept full responsibility for understanding them? More than one person here in Adland have accused me of saying things I have NEVER said or even inferred. So am I supposed to take the full responsibiltiy for their poor reading comprehension skills or their inaccurate memory? I think not as doing so would be both illogical and unrealistic. Neil

Hi Judy, Sorry, I disagree with you as I submit poor listening skills are responsible for more problems than poor speaking skills are. (One of the most famous results of poor listening was the British "Charge Of the Light Brigade" during the Crimean War resulting in the deaths of many.) If a person speaks in such a manner as to not be understood, the listener can ask them to clarify what they said. On the other hand, if someone does not listen as well as they should and misunderstands what was meant, there is no built in check as there is in speaking. The FACTS are the AVERAGE persons listening comprehension skill level is LESS than 23%. While working for National Cash Register Company building the large main frame computers, I took a series of management classes given by a company who was then one of the top management training companies in the world. (It was Dr. Vander Water & Associates and I hope I spelled their name right.) One of those classes they gave was on the normally untaught, yet very important, skill of listening. (Were I running things, classes on proper listening skills would be mandatory and would start in kindergarten.) Our class was made up of members of management & we were all supervisors of one type or another. Nearly all those in the class were college graduates & most supervised engineers. (Others supervised accounting, personal, purchasing, production control, inspection, shipping/receiving and production.) As part of a supervisors job is to listen to their employees as well as those they report to, their ability to listen effectively is very important. Yet, when we were both told we would be tested on our listening skills, when it was written on the chalk board for all to see and we all should have known we were being tested, our average score was ONLY 23 percent! ONLY TWENTY THREE PERCENT when people who SHOULD have higher skills than the average person and KNEW they were being tested took a listening skill test! THAT IS TERRIBLE! IF our class of mostly college graduate supervisiors, who should be able to listen better than most only scored 23%, what percent do you think most people listen at? I can guarantee you it is LESS than that! Please, Take Care! Neil

Come on Chuck, get real! You said: "The only timesomething from the outside can influence our life is when we allow it, we actually give it permission to enter." You allow someone to run into your car? For lighting to hit your home? For someone to assault you? When I was in est, (erhart seminar training), some "est holes" people who thought the founder (Werner Erhard) was some type of a god and/or also had poor listening skills reported Werner said: "We are responsible for what happened to us." They were wrong on two counts. 1. Some times, you are NOT even remotely responsible for things which happen to you. 2. Werner Erhard NEVER said it in the first place. What he said was: "You are responsible for how you handle (or respond) to what happens to you." What he said is rational, logical and the way it is in the real world. What you and the est holes said is not. Please, Take Care! Neil F.Y.I. Erhard Seminars Training, or est a large group awareness training) seminar program, became popular during the 1970s. Werner Erhard (born John Paul Rosenberg) founded est and conducted the first est seminar in San Francisco, California, in October 1971. Landmark Education bought the rights to the intellectual property contained in the Est Training in 1991 Neil says: While I attended the training and some of their events, I would never be considered an "est hole". I am very glad I went & I met some famous people at various functions, I didn't get that much out of it as their main teaching points were things I had always done. They were: "Be responsible for your own actions and tell the truth." I see a lot of misconceptions and lies about est. As I HATE lies and liars, they really piss me off. Last, during est's hayday, some thing like one out of every seven people who lived in my most favorite city EVER (Manhattan Beach, Ca.) were est graduates. I really wish est was still popular and still around.

OMG! I MADE A BIG BOO BOO! I AM SO EMBARRASSED! I have just proved that on occasion, my reading skills are very poor! What Judy said was: "There's is an art to speaking clearly and themore difficultart of listening." How I mis-read that, I have no clue! I can only apologize to Judy and to others for my error! So, SORRY I made an error and I apologize for doing so! DUMB ME! Please, Take Care! Neil

Hello Bogdan,

I do accept complete responsibility for understanding, but being understood is the responsibility of the reader.  If you do not understand my message, ask me.......