Little Girl & Little Boy
Two babies were sitting in their cribs, when one baby shouted to the other, “Are you a little girl or a little boy?”
“I don’t know,” replied the other baby giggling.
”What do you mean, you don’t know?” said the first baby.
“I mean I don’t know how to tell the difference,” was the reply.
Well, I do,” said the first baby chuckling. “I’ll climb into your crib and find out.”
He carefully climbed himself into the other baby’s crib, then quickly disappeared beneath the blankets. After a couple of minutes, he resurfaced with a big grin on his face.
“You’re a little girl, and I’m a little boy,” he said proudly.
“You’re ever so clever,” cooed the baby girl, “but how can you tell?”
“It’s quite easy really,” replied the baby boy, “You’ve got pink socks and I’ve got blue ones.”
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An Amazing Dog
A duck hunter was in the market for a new Bird Dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him. He decided to try to break the news to his friends and invited friends to hunt with him and his new dog.
As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. They fired and a duck fell.
The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog however did not sink, but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting wet more than his paws.
The friend saw everything but did not say a single word.
On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, “Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?”
“I sure did,” responded his friend. “He can’t swim.
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The Wife & The Mistress
A man wanted to determine if both his wife and mistress were faithful to him. So he decided to send them on the same cruise, then later question each one on the others behavior.
When his wife returned, he asked her about the people on the trip in general, then casually asked her about the specific behavior of the passenger he knew to be his mistress. “She flirted with nearly every man on the ship,” his wife reported.
The disheartened man then rendezvoused with his cheating mistress to ask her the same questions about his wife.
“She was a real lady,” his mistress said.
“How so?” the encouraged man asked.
“She came on board with her husband and never left his side.”
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Goodbye To Mother
A couple were going out for the evening. They’d got ready, all dolled up, got the cat put out, etc.
The taxi arrives, and as the couple got out, the cat shoots back in. They don’t want the cat shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the cat out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty while they're away, explains to the taxi driver “He’s just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother.”
A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. “Sorry I took so long” he says, “Stupid old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!”
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Keep Grinning, They'll All Wonder What Ya Been Up To,
Phil