Rock Band??? Been there done that! Then I had to get a job where you actually make money! LOL Well, I'd like everybody to think about the "tools of the trade" in MLM before I progress this topic any further - books, tapes and functions - the "bread and butter" of MLM. "tools of the trade"??? Gee! And I thought all you needed was a website these days. Everything has gone digital (books, audio, video), not to mention Free (in my experience) unless provided by someone other than your company or upline. I can't even remember the last time I had to leave the house to make a business presentation to a perspective distributor. I remember this used to be a big issue with Amway Distributors in the past (seeing that you mention Dexter). Is that still the case today?

Gary, I put my boxing gloves on : ) Us small folk like to tangle : ) I don't agree with that statement. I am currently marketing a skin care line that I happen to really like and really do use myself. My husband, who may not be the "norm", is very supportive of my efforts and tries to help in any way that he can. It has actually gotten us to spend more time together because he has some very good ideas that I wouldn't have thought up and, he is interested to see what I have done as far as marketing, both online and off.

Hello Heather, Jack, Winston, other forumites and lurkers. I have to congratulate you three because like Jack said you're "taking a shot" or as Heather said she's putting her "boxing gloves on." Winston must be a pacifist - LOL! Let me respond to each in turn starting in order of response... Jack You're all around the answer I was seeking without actually coming out and mentioning it directly. Yes, in a partnership the "chores" do tend to get split. One usually takes on the sponsoring role while the other does admin work and tries to peddle the wares to relatives, friends and neighbors (more on that in a moment). You said: ==================== "So you get a whole lot of new relationships and destroy old relationships." ==================== The books, tapes and functions are a tremendous resource. Originally they were designed to build people up in confidence. However, the big-pins promoted them so well that soon the value of the tools outweighed the value of the product moved. So, there was a business within a business. Disproportionately, the big-pins were the ones making the vast majority of the money. Surprise, surprise! That is all background. Also, disproportionately, a partnership, and for the sake of convenience we will refer to it as a marriage also suffered because the one "on the road" - usually the husband - got to listen to all the tapes. Most of them were what I call "ra-ra" tapes. Stuff like "you can do it - don't worry about the negative people" etc etc. Add to that the books and you can see what starts to happen. That lead to one party growing internally while the other remained the same. Often disdain set in where one partner began to see the other partner as "negative." Oh-oh. Looking around the business congregation little relationships began to form between partners from other marriages. Before anybody jumps in and says "bulldust" let me say I saw it happen many times and there is a website devoted (oddly) to broken marriages caused by "the business." Reading it is like reading a "who's who" of MLM. It's pretty sad stuff actually. To top it off a very senior Executive Diamond woman directly attributed her marriage breakdown to the business. How do I know that? The ED lady confided it to my sponsor with the warning: "This style of business will destroy your marriage." Without identifying people it is a name that many would recognize - a VERY big pin indeed - now, like so many others, no longer active in the business. So-called leadership meetings tended to re-inforce this unfortunate by-product too. Partners grew apart with resentment on both sides. "Gee, why isn't my partner more like him/her?" I could write a dozen pages about this but I won't. That was one side of my comment. The other side, and I think Linda may have mentioned this somewhere, was the losing of friends through being far too pushy with the "business." Let's face it - SOMEBODY has to buy these products. Friends and relations are prime targets. Part of the business technique is: 1 - try to sponsor first 2 - if sponsorship fails then turn them into a customer. However, this does not take into account the people who don't want to do either. They DON'T want to be a distributor and they DON'T want to be a customer. Fair enough. But the glassy-eyed MLMer cannot understand it and keeps pushing the issue. Again - resentment. Any person who has ever been in MLM will have experienced this. If you haven't been in MLM then chances are somebody in MLM has probably tried to either sponsor you or tried to push product onto you. This aspect can and does create tension in relationships too. These comments refer mostly to personal contact. Across the net, or digitally, as Winston refers to it, misunderstandings can be just as bad. Ever sent what you consider to be a seemingly innocuous comment to somebody via email and been FLAMED for it? Ever seen... HOW DARE YOU BLAH, BLAH, BLAH...? You look at it and think... huh? Even forum posters get flamed and abused from time to time. Often it is due to incorrect assumptions and interpretations. I expose myself to that every time I make comments here. Hence, my little jokes about flak jackets, kevlar helmets, grenades etc... Anyway, this post is getting far too long. I'll come back with comments for the other two replies next. As the Gov' said: "I'll be back!" Gary Simpson

Gary, All I can say right now is "Holy teledo Batman". In my own opinion, you're "marriage" has got to be pretty rocky to begin with if a business can break it up. Personally, I offer the products, if whomever I'm talking to isn't interested, I thank them for their time and ask if they can think of someone who may be interested in what I'm offering. I don't want people to buy my products out of friendship, a sense of guilt, or a sense of obligation. I want to sell my products to someone who is generally interested and will purchase from me again. Is there any point to a one-time sale in network marketing? I want a strong repeat customer base. I don't want to make people uncomfortable.

Gary, By the way, I see quite the friendship, between us, blossoming. You are SO my type of person. Love to interact with someone that makes me think. Thanks!!!!