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Peter Fogel

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RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week
1/31/2012 4:21:09 PM
Hi All,

Here's the first edition of NewsBusted for the week. In today's episode we'll learn about Barnie Frank's wedding plans, why the British medical journal debunks the myth that fried food causes heart disease and much more.

Shalom,

Peter


Topics in today's show:

--Obama's state of the union still being discussed

--Mitt Romney gave 14% more to charity than President Obama

--Barney Frank looks to get married

--British medical journal says fried food doesn't cause heart disease

Starring: Jodi Miller
Production: Dialog New Media


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ulq1tuxMufs&feature=uploademail


Peter Fogel
Babylon 7
+0
RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week
2/1/2012 8:46:47 PM

Great NewsBusted Peter.

Thoughts On Aging
- The aging process could be slowed down if it had to work its way through Congress.
- You're getting old when you're sitting in a rocker and you can't get it started.
- You're getting old when you wake up with that morning-after feeling, and you didn't do anything the night before.
- Doctor to patient: I have good news and bad news: the good news is that you are not a hypochondriac.
- It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.
- Last Will and Testament: Being of sound mind, I spent all my money.
- When you lean over to pick something up off the floor, you ask yourself if there is anything else you need to do while you are down there.
- Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
- There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory. I forget the other two.
- Middle age is when work is a lot less fun and fun is a lot more work.
- Statistics show that at the age of seventy, there are five women to every man. Isn't that a bad time for a guy to get those odds?
- You know you're getting on in years when the girls at the office start confiding in you.
- Middle age is when it takes longer to rest than to get tired.
- By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere.
- Middle age is when you have stopped growing at both ends, and have begun to grow in the middle.
- A man has reached middle age when he is cautioned to slow down by his doctor instead of by the police.
- You know you're into middle age when you realize that caution is the only thing you care to exercise.
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RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week
2/1/2012 8:48:38 PM
The Most Important Discoveries

Man discovered weapons, invented hunting.
Woman discovered hunting, invented furs.
Man discovered colors, invented painting.
Woman discovered painting, invented make-up.
Man discovered speech, invented conversation.
Woman discovered conversation, invented gossip.
Man discovered agriculture, invented food.
Woman discovered food, invented diet.
Man discovered friendship, invented love.
Woman discovered love, invented marriage.
Man discovered trade, invented money.
Woman discovered money, man has never recovered.
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Peter Fogel

1470
7259 Posts
7259
Invite Me as a Friend
Top 25 Poster
Person Of The Week
RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week
2/2/2012 8:56:56 AM
Hi All,

I got this one from a good friend today. It is funny but has an interesting moral to it as well, maybe even more then one. :)

Shalom,

Peter

Subject: DOG FOR SALE

A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house:
'Talking Dog For Sale.' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a
nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.

'You talk?' he asks.


'Yep,' the Lab replies.


After the guy recovers from the shock of
hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'

The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I
discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA.

In no time at all they had me jetting from
country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.'

'I was one of their most valuable spies for
eight years running...

But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering
near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.'
'I got married, had a
mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

'Ten dollars,' the guy says.

'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'

'Because he's a
Bull****ter.
He's never been out of the yard.'

Peter Fogel
Babylon 7
+0
Peter Fogel

1470
7259 Posts
7259
Invite Me as a Friend
Top 25 Poster
Person Of The Week
RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week
2/3/2012 3:15:56 PM
Hi All,

Here's the second edition of NewsBusted for the week. Today Jodi explains why Hillary plans to step down as Sec. of State soon, why Michal Moore is planning to vote Republican, why Rosie O'Donnell is gay and much more.

Shalom,

Peter


Topics in today's show:

--Timothy Geithner announces he's resigning from being Treasury Secretary

--Hillary Clinton also resigning as Secretary of State

--Steven Spielberg to direct movie about Moses

--Bacon and beef prices have gone up over 20% in the last 3 years

Starring: Jodi Miller
Production: Dialog New Media

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IY67T7g-Hw&feature=player_embedded


Peter Fogel
Babylon 7
+0


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