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Mary Evelyn 23244 5352 Strawb...	RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week 4/9/2011 7:19:32 PM
	Hello and I hope everyone is having a fantastic weekend. Peter it is great to see you back because you were sorely missed and the NewsBusted video is great as usual. Here is one I just got from my friend Cheryl from Ohio. A Priest and a Rabbi were sitting next to each other on an airplane. After a while, the Priest turned to the Rabbi and asked, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?" The Rabbi responded, "Yes, that is still one of our law.The Priest then asked, "Have you ever eaten pork?" To which the Rabbi replied, "Yes, on one occasion I did succumb to temptation and tasted a ham sandwich." The Priest nodded in understanding and went on with his reading. A while later, the Rabbi spoke up and asked the Priest, "Father, is it still a requirement of your church that you remain celibate?" The Priest replied, "Yes, that is still very much a part of our faith." The Rabbi then asked him, "Father, have you ever fallen to the temptations of the flesh?" The Priest replied, "Yes, Rabbi, on one occasion I was weak and broke my faith." The Rabbi nodded understandingly and remained silent, thinking, for about five minutes. Finally, the Rabbi said, "Beats the sh*it out of a ham sandwich, doesn't it?" :)

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Peter 1470 7259 Lod	RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week 4/9/2011 7:38:35 PM
	Hey Evelyn, That joke is hilarious and the Rabbi sure got it right. :) Shalom, Peter Quote: Hello and I hope everyone is having a fantastic weekend. Peter it is great to see you back because you were sorely missed and the NewsBusted video is great as usual. Here is one I just got from my friend Cheryl from Ohio. A Priest and a Rabbi were sitting next to each other on an airplane. After a while, the Priest turned to the Rabbi and asked, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?" The Rabbi responded, "Yes, that is still one of our law.The Priest then asked, "Have you ever eaten pork?" To which the Rabbi replied, "Yes, on one occasion I did succumb to temptation and tasted a ham sandwich." The Priest nodded in understanding and went on with his reading. A while later, the Rabbi spoke up and asked the Priest, "Father, is it still a requirement of your church that you remain celibate?" The Priest replied, "Yes, that is still very much a part of our faith." The Rabbi then asked him, "Father, have you ever fallen to the temptations of the flesh?" The Priest replied, "Yes, Rabbi, on one occasion I was weak and broke my faith." The Rabbi nodded understandingly and remained silent, thinking, for about five minutes. Finally, the Rabbi said, "Beats the sh*it out of a ham sandwich, doesn't it?" :)
	Peter Fogel Babylon 7
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Mary Evelyn 23244 5352 Strawb...	RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week 4/10/2011 12:32:38 AM
	Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn't you say? Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day. I just couldn't help but send this along. Too funny. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says Really? Ya think? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers Now that's taking things a bit far! ----------------------------------------------------------- Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over What a guy! --------------------------------------------------------------- Miners Refuse to Work after Death No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's! ------------------------------------------------------ J u venile Court to Try Shooting Defendant See if that works any better than a fair trial! ---------------------------------------------------------- War Dims Hope for Peace I can see where it might have that effect! ---------------------------------------------------------------- If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile Ya think?! ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures Who would have thought! ---------------------------------------------------------------- Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide They may be on to something! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges You mean there's something stronger than duct tape? ---------------------------------------------------------- Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge He probably IS the battery charge! ---------------------------------------------- New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group Weren't they fat enough?! ----------------------------------------------- Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft That's what he gets for eating those beans! ---------------- --------------------------------- Kids Make Nutritious Snacks Do they taste like chicken? ************************************** Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half Chainsaw Massacre all over again! *********************************************** Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors Boy, are they tall! ***************************************** And the winner is.... Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead Did I read that right?

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Robert 341 669 Brussels	RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week 4/10/2011 6:12:05 PM
	If Peter is offline so often it's because he has not cracked The Secret Human Resource Code yet ;-) Just a thought, so here it is.... “COMPETITIVE SALARY” Most of our competitors don’t pay much either. “JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY” We have no time to train you. “CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE” You’ll be here very late, very often — might as well be comfortable. “MUST BE DEADLINE-ORIENTED” Your first four projects are already way overdue. “SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED” Did we mention that you’ll be here very late, very often? And most weekends. “DUTIES WILL VARY” Anyone in the office can boss you around. “MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL” We have no quality control. “CAREER-MINDED” Female applicants must be childless. “APPLY IN PERSON” If you’re old, fat or ugly, that position has already been filled. “NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE” This job listing is just a legal formality. The position was filled by some executive’s nephew. “SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE” Due to consolidation, you’ll be replacing three people. “PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST” This company is a total mess. “REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS” You’ll have all the responsibilities of upper management, without the pay, title or respect. “GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS” Listen to management, figure out what they want, don’t ask too many questions and get the sh*t done. ================ And Hmmm! Rather ... well, if you enjoy golf we could understand. The room was full of pregnant women and their partners, and the Lamaze class was in full swing. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, along with informing the men how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan. The teacher then announced, “Ladies, exercise is good for you. Walking is especially beneficial. And, gentlemen, it wouldn’t hurt you to take the time to go walking with your partner!” The room really got quiet. Finally, a man in the middle of the group raised his hand. “Yes?” replied the teacher. “Is it alright if she carries the golf bag while we walk?”
	Video Tips and Tricks. The Business Arrow. Skype: rob.dm
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Peter 1470 7259 Lod	RE: Your Friday Chuckle - Every Day Of The Week 4/10/2011 6:47:19 PM
	Hi All, Evelyn the list is hilarious. In this day and age of spell check and proof readers you still find the ridiculous and sometimes diabolically funny in the newspapers. This one's about lady luck and this guy sure had more then his fair share. :) Shalom, Peter Incredible story of lottery luck - too funny! This has to be the feel-good story of the year! If this doesn't touch your heart, then you just don't have one. An incredible story of luck and inspiration... Can you believe it? This guy wins $181 million in the lottery last Wednesday, and then...............Finds the love of his life just 2 days later. Talk about LUCK!
	Peter Fogel Babylon 7
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