A Dog Named Sex
When I went to City Hall to renew my dog's license
I told the clerk I wanted a license for Sex. He said,
"I'd like one too!" Then I said, "But this is a dog."
He said he didn't care what she looked like.
Then I said, "You don't understand. I've had Sex
since I was nine years old." He winked at me and
said, "You must have been quite a kid."
````````````````````````````````````````````
When I got married and went on my honeymoon I took
my dog with me. I told the hotel clerk I wanted a room
for my wife and myself, and a special room for Sex.
He said, "You don't need a special room for Sex. As
long as you pay your bill, we don't care what you do."
I said, "Look, you don't seem to understand. Sex keeps
me awake at night." The clerk said, "Funny, I have the
same problem."
`````````````````````````````````````````````
Well, one day I entered Sex in a contest but before the
competition began the dog got loose and ran away.
Another contestant asked me why I was just standing
there looking disappointed. I told him I had planned to
have Sex in the contest. He said, "Wonderful! If you
sell tickets you'll clean up!" "But you don't understand",
I said. "I want to have Sex on TV." He said, "They
already have that on Cable. It's no big deal any more."
``````````````````````````````````````````````
Well my wife and I decided to separate, so we went to court
to fight for custody of the dog. I said to the judge, "Your
Honor, I had Sex before I was married." The Judge said,
"The courtroom is not a confessional. Please stick to the
facts." Then I told him that after I was married Sex left me.
He said, "Me too."
`````````````````````````````````````````````````
Well last night Sex ran away again, and I spent hours looking
all over for him. A cop came over to me and asked, What are
you doing in this alley at four o'clock in the morning?" I said,
"I'm looking for Sex." My case comes up soon.