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Hi Venerina,
You have started a most interesting thread here.
I find it most interesting that no one has mentioned, yet, that love is a choice.
Just as God has chosen to love us from the very beginning, we have the ability also to choose to love.
The concept of "falling in love" is a very dangerous one, as it also carries with it the implication that we can "fall out of love." It implies that we have no choice - that it just happens and we have no control over it.
When we love someone, it is because we have chosen to love that person. We choose to love our friends, our relatives, our spouses, our children and whomever else we love.
What is most unfortunate in this world is that so many people who think they just fell in love with the one who became their spouse, have children, then leave their spouse because they think they have fallen out of love. It creates a most difficult situation for the children because of the mixed messages! The children in such a situation will wonder when they are going to stop being loved, considering that the parents have stopped loving each other.
When we realise that love is a choice, we begin to understand that there is a reason why we begin to love in the first place. We love, not because of some chemical reaction (that's called lust) or because we have no choice - genetic coding forces us to love our children - again, ridiculous - but because we have chosen to love for reasons that make sense and are reasonable to us.
We make our choice unconsciously; that is, we don't realize that we are choosing to love, which is why we think we fall in love or have no choice but to love our children.
But the fact is, we choose to love someone because there are qualities about that person that are important and valuable to us. Even the love we have for our children is a choice. We love our children because they come from us and are a part of how we define ourselves.
There are several different kinds of love; eros, philial and agape love.
Eros is the least likely to last, as it is physical and chemical and the most selfish. It's bonds are temporary and very weak, lasting only as long as it satisfies the self.
Philial love is the love that people have for friends, including their spouses. It is a bond that is mutually satisfying, based on common beliefs, ideas, interests, etc. It can last a lifetime, but can also be destroyed by unfaithfulness, changing interests, diverging paths, etc.
Agape love is the highest form of love. Agape has no conditions. Once the choice is made to love, nothing can change it. Since it is unconditional, it can't be broken. (If it could be broken, it would be conditional!) This is a form of love that is supernatural - ie - it is not natural for humans to have this kind of love. It is the kind of love that enables spouses to continue to love each other no matter what happens, and the kind of love that enables a parent to continue to love a child no matter what that child does.
Since agape is supernatural, it can only come from the supernatural. In other words, it is something we can have only when we have a personal relationship with our supernatural Creator, who is the first one to choose to love us unconditionally.
It is my greatest desire in life for all to experience this kind of amazing love for themselves.
God bless,
Dave
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