The Washington Post recently held a clever little poetry
contest for its readers that put a whole new twist on the
idea of romantic poetry. The Post asked its readers to
submit two-line rhyming poems BUT the first line had to
be the most romantic, and the second line the least
romantic. It turned out to be a lot of fun. So, here are
eleven entries that finished at the top, according to the
Post's judges.
1. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you has screwed up my life.
2. I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.
3. Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.
4. Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
But I only slept with you because I was pissed.
5. I thought that I could love no other --
that is until I met your brother.
6. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet,
and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.
7. I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But take that paper bag off your face.
8. I love your smile, your face, and your eyes.
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!
9. My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?
10. My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe 'Go to Hell'.
11. What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.