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Pauline Raina

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An Open Letter To Peter Fogel
12/13/2008 8:43:24 AM

Dear Friends,


I have one request, my posts to Peter is posted here purely for my benefit of owning up to the harsh things I said to him. Please take it in the context it is meant. For this I shall be eternally grateful toyou.

Thank you for being my friend.

hugz n blessings always

Pauline


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Peter,

I have been battling with the urge to do this for quite some time now, but today is when I have finally worked it out in my mind and heart to  come thru with it.

 What I put forth here is something that does not make me feel proud I did. I let satan in for a minute and he played havoc with my emotions. Never again…I have promised myself !

 Peter ironically our conversation did start with me sharing with you this post on ‘forgiveness’ but it went on to anything but that.


Forgive
11/24/2008

We must forgive those who hurt us. The reason is simple: Bitterness and unforgiveness are claws that set their hooks deep in our hearts; they are chains that keep us held captive to the wounds and the messages of those wounds. Until you forgive, you remain their prisoner. Paul warns us that unforgiveness and bitterness can wreck our lives and the lives of others (Eph. 4:31; Heb. 12:15). We have to let them go.

Forgive as Christ has forgiven you. (Col 3:13)

Now – listen carefully. Forgiveness is a choice. It is not a feeling – don't try and feel forgiving. It is an act of the will. "Don't wait to forgive until you feel like forgiving," wrote Neil Anderson. "You will never get there. Feelings take time to heal after the choice to forgive is made . . ." We allow God to bring the hurt up from our past, for "if your forgiveness doesn't visit the emotional core of your life, it will be incomplete." We acknowledge that it hurt, that it mattered, and we choose to extend forgiveness to our father, our mother, those who hurt us. This is not saying, "It didn't really matter"; it is not saying, "I probably deserved part of it anyway." Forgiveness says, "It was wrong. Very wrong. It mattered, hurt me deeply. And I release you. I give you to God."

It might help to remember that those who hurt you were also deeply wounded themselves. They were broken hearts, broken when they were young, and they fell captive to the Enemy. They were in fact pawns in his hands. This doesn't absolve them of the choices they made, the things they did. It just helps us to let them go – to realize that they were shattered souls themselves, used by our true Enemy in his war against femininity.

(Captivating, 102-103)



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*******************************************************************


here are some of my posts to you which I am  EXTREMELY SORRY I had to write to you in response to your numerous allegations of fixing the bfa, of who the judges were, of bribery etc;I had to forward your letters to Bogdan to let him know first hand of what I was being accused of, and for him to make an accurate judgement.

 

FOR THIS I ASK FORGIVENESS.


You are so off the mark !!! I have sent the score sheets to Bogdan, and if he thinks I have fixed this...then I will be the first to go from the BFA I have Joe as my witness to. So you are free to draw your own conclusion.I am glad we are friends no more, friends do not think the lowest of one you call friend. I too thought of you too highly I guess, but I was wrong absolutely wrong. Because of how quick you are to assume things so degrading of me. THANK YOU for giving me this certificate. GOD IS MY JUDGE !!! I believe I will live to see the result of all of this before my very eyes. HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN FAITHFUL TO MY HEARTS CRY, AND RIGHT NOW ITS CRYING OUT TO HIM TO BRING JUSTICE TO ME, and I know he will. VERY SOON!!


That is all I have to say.

God bless You Peter

Pauline

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On Wed, Dec 10, 2008 at 8:20 AM, Pauline Raina <sybella53@yahoo.com> wrote:

 

You know what Peter,

 

I am not interested in knowing what you do or think. About your ‘what if’ of posting stuff in the open...believe me I would do it myself with out any fear. But if I choose not to is for reasons that you & I will not see eye to eye. So I am not going to bother to elaborate. You are free indeed to draw up your own conclusions as always.

 

I am sorry the way things have turned out it gives me no joy. But if this is the way it is ...it is. Think of me the lowest as you wish be my guest !! Life still goes on and I will live it one day at a time.

 

Some day I pray God will reveal to you how wrong you were about me. That is all I have to say in my defense. This will be my last post to you & I will appreciate you do the same.

 

Be happy with your thoughts...goodbye!

 

Pauline

 

******************************************************************************

 

I let the untruth of it get to me and responded in haste and emotionally. Which proved very contrary to my heart and who I am. But I am not ashamed to say I AM SORRY. I must also be honest and say that all the tirade of accusations did and have hurt me more than words can say. I would lie if I say it still doesn’t hurt. But I know with time it will go away. The first step has been taken in that direction  and I am glad I’ve done this.

 

 I do not from henceforth hold any grudge against you or any other friends who have spoken in support of you and against me. I say SORRY  to Lilly, Branka, Vladmir, Geketa and anyone else whom I might have hurt in the process of hurting you. I do this for myself, not because of the season, or any other reason, its purely to unburden my heart of the guilt that it has felt ever since I wrote those words to you. Because as you rightly said it is contrary Me.

 

I have resolved never again to let emotion push my buttons. Silence is better, far better as I usually practice. But for some reason this time was different, cant remember the last time I did this,Thats how long ago it was.

 

With that said, I pray we can move on, and put the past behind us.

 

God Bless you all

 

Pauline






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Thomas Richmond

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Re: An Open Letter To Peter Fogel
12/13/2008 10:02:07 AM

Good day Pauline, i know how you feel and i know how hard it must feel like again to have your heart open up like this in public, take it from me. i try to teach forgiveness in hopes to make a better community for all and i see some of the fruits have been met recently, unfortunately we do lose some in the process, call it human error but God always prevails no matter what with his unfailing love. So many scriptures come to mind, i'll leave you with this and Pauline thank you for sharing with us. God_bless you. 1 John 1:7-9 "But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son,purifies us from ALL sin."  Thomas

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Roger Macdivitt .

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Re: An Open Letter To Peter Fogel
12/13/2008 12:13:53 PM

Pauline,

You prove to be a bigger and better person than you think you are.

Bless you, I never had any doubts.

Roger

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Patricia Bartch

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Re: An Open Letter To Peter Fogel
12/13/2008 12:32:21 PM

I never had any doubt about you Pauline.  Anymore than I had doubt about myself as I think I was put down in rigging the BFA.

You know as well as Bogdan and the other people who are really ininvolved in the BFA, that I wasn't a judge.  It really hurt me to have my name put out there as someone who would fix it or whatever. 

All I can say is that folks should read and READ Sami's forum about Forgiveness.  BillDaddy wrote a wonderful note about forgiveness.   'The Spirit of Forgiveness for A New Beginning' Disscussion Topic @ AdlandPro Community

I've done my part in asking that if I've offended people to please accept my apology.  You did that as well Pauline.  Thanks for cautioning me to keep on the path and not post through anger.  You're so wise!

Again...I'm sorry.

Pat

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Roger Macdivitt .

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Re: An Open Letter To Peter Fogel
12/13/2008 12:56:10 PM

Patricia,

Well said.

We have a lot of brave, lovely and sincere ladies here.

I'm proud to associate with you.

Roger

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