Men, in an attempt to understand women you must study how their merit/demerit point system operates. Do something she likes and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. I'm sorry, that's the way she plays the game. Here's a guide to the points system:
Simple duties:
you make the bed +1
you make the bed but forget the decorative pillows 0
you throw the bedspread over rumpled sheet -1
you leave the toilet seat up -5
you replace the toilet paper 0
you go out to buy her tampons +5
in the snow +8
but return with beer -5
and no tampons -25
you check out a suspicious noise at night 0
you pummel it with a six iron +10
it's her dog -40
At the party:
you stay with her the entire time 0
you leave her to talk with a drinking buddy -2
named Stephanie -10
Stephanie is a dancer -25
with breast implants -150
Your physique:
you develop a pot-belly -15
you exercise to get rid of it +10
you try and hide it with a Hawaiian shirt -40
you say, "it doesn't matter, you have one too" -800
The big question:
she asks, "does this dress make me look fat?"
you hesitate in responding -10
you reply, "where?" -35
you reply, "I think it's your bottom" -100
any other response -20
It's that time of the month:
you talk -100
you don't talk -150
you spend time with her -200
you don't spend time with her -500
you are seen to be enjoying yourself -
you lose, bigtime!
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