Dear like-minded friends,
I am Jeshua speaking. You are my brothers and sisters. I join you here as an equal, not as one who is exalted above you, but as a friend, a comrade. Feel the common source through which we are connected. Feel the life flow between us, the connection that heals and sets us free.
Have respect for yourself in the same way as you do for the others in this gathering. Respect means to value yourself by realizing who you really are and what you have taken on in this journey to be in a body of flesh and blood, here and now, on this Earth.
It was a leap of faith, and deep within you is a belief, a force, a deep consciousness by which you have chosen to be here. Each of you said “yes” to this incarnation, to your present life. That moment of saying “yes” was based on a very deep knowing, yet doubts have since arisen due to old memories from experiences of other lives on Earth.
Those doubts have veiled the clear and obvious “yes,” and have caused it to become cloudy and obscured. You have felt lost in this earthly adventure, alone and abandoned. I know this pain from having experienced it.
I have been portrayed too often as a saint, an enlightened one who knew everything. That was not so, for I have known deep doubts and fears. That was part of my journey, as it is part of yours, so see me in my imperfection, my brokenness.
When I lived on Earth, I was inspired by a light to which I wanted to bear witness; a light that is beyond words, that contains love, wonder, beauty, humor, and wisdom. That light was not from me, but it was given from through me, just as is the case with you.
But I also had moments of deep despair through experiencing a lack of understanding from those around me, of not feeling recognized, just as you do. Which is why I could reach out to people who were very lonely; despairing people who felt pain, both physically and emotionally; people who found themselves in a spiritual wasteland.
I could understand those people, because I had experienced, within myself, the emotions, moods, and thoughts they were experiencing.
Human experience, with all its heights and depths, is necessary in order for your light to shine here. What you experience now in your life as darkness, as gloom, as obstacle, all that is part of your journey. It is not an obstruction you should try to avoid. It is more about your ability to accept these things and to bring the light of your heart to them, just as a stone can be lit up from within and become a beautiful gem.
That is the task you are destined for: to experience the darkness, to understand it from within, and then to light it up and undergo the whole range of human experiences; to envelop them with consciousness and to feel them through and through. Then the Christ energy awakens in a human being – and being human is required for this to happen.
You can not develop that energy, that particular unique power and brilliance of the Christ energy, in highly etheric realms where resistance and the depth of the human experience is lacking. See then that what seemingly holds you back, what causes you to resist, what discourages or bothers you, and what you might abhor, as precisely your destiny, the purpose for which you are here.
It is a magical experience to help another human to enlighten from within, who then becomes a being through which miracles can happen. There are stories told about me regarding miracles, and sudden physical and mental healings. But the power I had was not one of being a magician; it was not a mystical trick through which miracles happened.
I could reach people who were ripe for it, who were about to experience a breakthrough on the inner level, through my deep understanding of their humanity. I made no judgment about who they were, their negative or positive sides; I was just there. And there were people who, in their contact with me, experienced love and that love made them whole.
It was as if their true nature was called upon to suddenly awaken, and that is what happens in such a magical moment. It was not something I actually did, it was something that happened in the interaction between us.
The fact that I was open is what made it possible for me to receive the Christ light and to be able to pass it on to others. And this openness I am talking about is very often attained, as a human being, through an experience of crisis. You are usually caught up in all sorts of beliefs about what might or might not happen, or should or should not be, before you are actually open to the Christ light.
You are full of ideas and patterns of thought that create a multitude of emotions and moods. You try to shape your world, your life, from such ideas and thought patterns until you come up against something that is so enormous you can not find a tidy way to avoid it, and then all your certainties, your beliefs and thought patterns, are swept away. You fall into a deep hole and this can bring up an overwhelming amount of fear.
You can also call this “the dark night of the soul,” and it is a frightening experience. At the same time, there is the possibility that you can become open and realize you no longer know the “right” way, and then a part of you gives up, while another part opens up. The part that gives up is the defensive, resisting part that always thinks it knows better, that is impatient, that wants and demands all kinds of things from life.
That part often dies away in a crisis, and if you dare to let it die, the light can begin to shine inwardly. You can here see that a crisis experience, something that seems too much to be digested, also has the potential for an opening to the light. But it is a very intense experience, because the part that dies does not want to die, it wants to hold on – it resists.
I ask you to bring to mind the part in you that is opposed to your light and is against the light in general: the light of the cosmos that wants to flow through you. Something in you wants to protect itself against that possibility, so feel, if you can, the hesitation when I ask of you to imagine that the light flows through you very easily and freely, through all parts of your body and out into the world.
What does this image call up in you? Can you allow that possibility? Do you feel it is even possible? Or is there something in you that wants to protect, to shield? And look at that protective part and see it before you as a guard. Ask yourself: “Why do I need this shield?”
Take this defensiveness seriously, because there is something in you that feels the need to have this shield in place. Respect that part in you because the shield always has a purpose. It is there to protect a very vulnerable part of you.
What part in you will not permit the light? What part in you experiences it as too much to ask of you, or as threatening, or as even dangerous? And approach this part gently, as you would a child. See it as a child who has become discouraged, a child who has turned its life energy inward.
Approach this child very gently and see how beautiful it is; it still radiates beauty even with this extreme vulnerability and defensiveness. Kneel down before this child and envelop it with your generosity and kindness. Kneel down in gentle acceptance without wanting the child to change, or wanting to impose anything on the child.
Sit down quietly, in a relaxed way, with this child and feel how you can take the place of that shield. Until now, the child has felt protected by this defensive barrier between you and the outside world, but this shield is also a barrier between you and your deepest feelings.
Ask the child if you can take the place of this shield. Simply ask the child: “Will you allow me to take care of you, is that okay with you?” Ask honestly and openly: “Am I protecting you sufficiently?” And let it speak freely. Maybe it says: “No, I’m not safe enough, I’m afraid.”
Ask what it needs, or what you can do, to make it feel safe. Take your time when doing this, because you can have this conversation with your inner child over and over again. It is a living being, a part of you that carries a lot of love, and so has a lot of love to give. But it should feel safe on Earth and that is why your gentleness and faithfulness are necessary.
When you have erected a defensive barrier, a shield, to protect and hide your inner child, you are no longer consciously connected to that child; it becomes hidden from you. You strike out, for example, from defensiveness, or you close off at certain times in your life, and you do not know why this is happening.
You can become angry, or disappointed, or discouraged, and when this happens it is because there are automatic reactive patterns at work that stand between you and your inner child.
By renewing the connection with this vulnerable child within you, and beginning the conversation over and over again, you can gradually find a way to resolve these automatic reactive patterns – the defensive barrier – but it demands patience and gentleness on your part.
And it asks of you to understand, very deeply, that this vulnerable part of you is no obstacle which must be avoided or overcome, and it should not be eliminated.
It is intended that you grow by way of this child by enveloping it with understanding and love, and then the Christ light awakens in you. Gone are the fixed ideas and judgments and beliefs, and forever striving and struggling for something you think you need.
Instead, there is now a willingness and openness in you to meet yourself over and over again through attention and wonder. By not thinking that you already know what you need and what is good for you, you allow yourself to be surprised by the answers of your inner child.
This is your path, because the soul has something to learn from the human experience. Sometimes you see heaven, the world in which the soul belongs, as a perfect world, but also as a place from where you have been cast out. You were then forced to survive in an imperfect and often alien world, the Earth, where so many emotions weigh you down, and this feels like a punishment.
But the realm from where you came, the world of the soul, is not perfect, either. Something essential is missing there and that is why you have always taken the leap of faith into incarnation. It is life itself, this groping search, this deep and intense way of experiencing – which is possible especially on Earth – through which your understanding, your patience, insight, and compassion become deep and substantial.
That is the spiritual meaning of life on Earth. The glimpses of perfection you can experience here – often in moments of simplicity, or through insight, or in an experience of pure enjoyment and beauty – such glimpses carry more weight than simply being in a euphoric state for years in the heavenly realms.
It is certainly wonderful to be in an atmosphere of harmony, with less resistance and fewer heights and depths, and you long for that. But do not deny the beauty and the deep spiritual value of life on Earth, of what you are going through.
Take the experience, the wisdom, and the breakthroughs you experience here into the realms of light, and those realms will gain more substance and more aliveness because of that.
There is an ongoing interaction between the realm of Earth and the realms “on the other side.” Treasure your own life as valuable. You are brave; you act powerfully; so acknowledge your own light.
I enjoy our being together here. When I am here, although I am not in a body, I become human in some small way, and I remember again how it is to be human. The burden, yes, but also the moments of lightness, friendship, and solidarity, which touch the soul very deeply.
The bonds of friendship built up on Earth remain with the soul and continue doing their work forever, so precious is life on Earth.
I thank you all for being together and I greet each one of you from my heart.
Translation by Maria Baes and Frank Tehan
© Pamela Kribbe
www.jeshua.net