Hello Monica,
How disgusting, HEHEHEHEHE,
These might not work in the US English/English English terminology but I'll risk it.
A man went to see his doctor as he was suffering from accute stomach pains.
He said
''doctor, can you give me something for my diarrhoea?''
The doctor gave him two buckets and a bowl. OOOOOOh
The doctor then said,
''When did you first notice that you had diarrhoea?''
The man said,
''When I took off my bicycle trouser clips'' OOOOOOOOOh.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A preacher bicycling his way to church to conduct a service before breakfast.
Before he reached the church he had terrible pains in his tummy so he parked his cycle and crouched down behind a tree to relieve himself of the pain.
At that very moment a local hunter was passing and saw the preacher, he thought ''I can have some fun at his expense'' , and so....
The hunter had been shooting birds and had been gutting them into a bucket,so....
he crept round behind the preacher and emptied the bucket behind the preacher, so.....
The preacher stood up and was about to go on his way to church when he saw the mess behind him, so.........
Some time later, after the service, the preacher arrived home and had to refuse the wonderful breakfast that his wife had prepared, stating that he was
''too unwell''.
''What happened to you?'' she said.
The preacher related the story and told her that he was sure that half of his inside had come out.
''That's terrible'', she said, ''What did you do?''
''Well'', he said, ''by the Lords grace and the use of my bicycle pump I got it all back in''. OOOOOOOOOh
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SORRY ABOUT THAT BUT YOU STARTED IT.
By the way: Don't tell that one over the sweet course after dinner,
I only have to say ''Did you hear the one about the preacher?'' and my wifeinforms me that I am putting my life at risk.
Roger