Hello friends …
I’m doing it again but this time you can all blame Bogdan for this thread hehehe … Something he wrote, in my last thread, got the clogs turning in my mind again …
If you haven’t read Bogdan’s post … then please do so …
What is real to you?
Bogdan wrote ….
<<"In essence it doesn't matter if things are happening to us or if we imagine them for the chemical reaction to happen in our bodies. We can create emotions by imaging situations which will produce thoughts which if put into action will change reality around us.">>
<<…the longer we deal with something or the more often we imagine it, we become better at it.>>
Based on this … I would like to introduce you all to a concept which some may be familiar with, and others not, but it could help you all tremendously in business and in your personal relationships with others… It is the concept of … NLP, or Neuro-linguistic programming, which is a set of tools that can be used to teach people to identify personal goals, change unhelpful beliefs, reach a higher level of achievement, and communicate better with others. It can be used to identify and change “unconscious” patterns of thinking and behaviour, to bring more positivism in one’s life, more success and motivation, help influence others and improve communication between individuals.
NLP is based on the belief that the brain (i.e. neuro) controls how the body functions; language (i.e. linguistic) determines how people communicate; and programming is used to develop models for interaction. NLP involves studying the relationship between all three parts. It propagates that thinking is closely related to the five senses, that experiences are recreated in memories through the senses, and that these are what limit people's abilities and beliefs. It is through understanding that people can create their own internal world and once they achieve that understanding, they can realize that they have the power to change their behaviour towards themselves and towards others.
Each one of us has what is known as an internal communication system processor… by which we understand ourselves and the environment around us… and by which other people understand us and respond to us …. Although we all have the same system processors, some people use one more than another. Some may be more visual in their approach to communication.., (ie. they use picture images to understand and think things through in their mind), some are more auditory, (ie. they need to hear particular sounds and noises to understand and ponder), and some are more kinaesthetic, (ie. they are more emotional and sensitive to their environment and, therefore, need to “feel” in order to perceive).
By simply changing the way we communicate with ourselves, internally, and by changing the way we communicate with others, all things are possible. Goals are achievable and the defeatist attitude can be a thing of the past.
You will often find that two people who really cannot see eye to eye … are just communicating and perceiving with two different system processors…. How many times have you come really close to selling something to someone, or convincing someone of something, or doing really well in a job interview, only to be shot down like lead, during the closure part, without truly understanding why? … You know … they sat there the whole time smiling, making you feel good, nodding … but … when the crunch came to the crunch … you hadn’t convinced them at all …. Maybe they didn’t even hear what you were really saying … why? … because perhaps you didn’t adjust your communication to their, particular, processing system… which means … putting yourself in their shoes and viewing the world from their perspective and through their processor ….
You could start an argument, and alienate someone from you, very easily, by saying … “You’re wrong!!!” … but you could bring someone around to a more respectful and positive frame of mind, to keep discussions open and negotiable by simply changing those two words to … “We can agree to disagree” … neither party is belittled or shown a lack of respect and both parties can carry on trying to find a negotiable, and acceptable, common ground.
However, good dialogue starts within us and since we are the person we spend the most time talking to, throughout our life, we should be our best friend …. And think about it … you would never give your best friend bad advice …. So, our internal dialogue is the most important one we ever have…. We can be positive and encouraging towards ourselves, or we can be negative and tale a defeatist attitude .... We can choose to talk ourselves up … ie. auto inspire ourselves or we can choose to talk ourselves down … and fall into the trap of low self-esteem and risk failure.
The positive and encouraging internal dialogue will bring about a positive mental attitude... as Bogdan’s statement pointed out …. Because for as long as “I believe I can, I know I will” …. And the more I program myself with those thoughts, the more I am setting myself up to walk the path that will lead me to my ultimate goal and successful outcome ….
This positive internal dialogue is nothing more than me giving myself the motivation, determination and persistence to achieve whatever I desire .... therefore, I am feeding my subconscious mind with an “acceptable truth” that “I am”, which becomes my reality and has a cause and effect of positive actions and positive outcomes. My whole essence is suddenly veered towards, and set up, for success.
You will often find that successful people do not know the meaning of failure ... the word does not exist in their dictionary .... they may encounter "challenges", “obstacles”, or “hurdles” to jump over but they never see failure … when you see failure you are condemning yourself to achieving failure … you are not even giving yourself a chance, which is where the negative and defeatist internal dialogue comes into play …
The defeatist will say: “I can’t do this …. I give up!!!….I don’t know how to … I’m not good enough“
The successful people, and the leaders, would, instead, ask themselves: “What’s stopping me? … What have I got to lose? … What’s the worst that could happen?…”
And yes, … success and leadership, also, mean taking risks and stepping out from the crowd …
When you say … “I’m not good enough” …to yourself… who are you comparing yourself to? … what basis do you have for putting yourself down, instead of believing in yourself and your abilities? Why not try to replace this question, thinking about … where you started out, how far you have come and all the achievements that you have accomplished on your journey through life.
When you change the way you dialogue with yourself, you will begin to change the way you dialogue with others and that ... my friends ... is when "all things become possible".
Have a lovely weekend
Best wishes to all
Venerina