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Hi Everyone,
"Warning-May Offend Some"
There is no intentions though,so go on check them out.
Woman's Humour
My boyfriend, not happy with my mood swings, bought me a mood
ring the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods. When
I'm in a good mood it turns green. When I'm in a bad mood it leaves a
big f*ng red mark on his forehead.Maybe next time he'll buy me a diamond.
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My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, "This will
make you happy tonight." He was right. When he went
out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs. He couldn't get
back in.A couple are lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you
the happiest woman in the world." The woman says, "I'll miss you."
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Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumour.
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He said - Since I first laid eyes on you, "I've wanted to make love to you
really badly".
She said - "Well, you've succeeded".
He said 'Shall we try swapping positions tonight?'.
She said 'That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while
I sit on the sofa and fart'.
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He said 'What have you been doing with all the grocery money
that I Gave you?
She said 'Turn sideways and look in the mirror you fat bastard'.
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Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.
Q: What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
A: Through his chest with a sharp knife.
Q: Why do men want to marry virgins?
A: They can't stand criticism.
Q: Why is it so hard for women to find men that are
sensitive,caring and good looking?
A: Because those men already have boyfriends.
Q: What makes men chase women if they have no intention
of marrying?
A: The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no
intention of driving.
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Thanks
Leanne Busby
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