Hello My Friends,

Since it's Thursday, here's a few Bonus Chuckles. Some of my favorite Bumper Stickers...

Where there's a will ... I want to be in it.

I took an IQ test and the results were negative.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

A day without sunshine is, like, night.

Two wrongs don't make a right, but two Wrights made an airplane.

Honk if you love peace and quiet.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

A penny saved is a government oversight.

The buck doesn't even slow down here!

Originality is the art of concealing your sources.

Shin - Device for finding furniture in the dark

Which is the non-smoking lifeboat?

It said 'Insert disk #3', but only two will fit.

I've taken a vow of poverty. To annoy me, send money.

A waist is a terrible thing to mind.

COLE'S LAW: Thinly sliced cabbage.

Help stamp out and eradicate superfluous redundancy.

Energizer bunny arrested, charged with battery.

Life is sexually transmitted.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive, anyway

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.

When you're finally holding all the cards, why does everyone else decide to play chess?

Never knock on Death's door: Ring the doorbell and run (he hates that).

I don't have a problem with willpower. It's won't power I have a problem with

My life has a superb cast, but I can't figure out the plot.

We do precision guesswork.

Nothing's impossible for those who don't have to do it.

The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.

Advice is free: The right answer will cost plenty.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

Keep honking, I'm reloading.

WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition

It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

Anything free is worth what you pay for it

Everyone is entitled to my opinion.

Gene Police: YOU!! Out of the pool!

I used to be indecisive; now I'm not sure.

My reality check just bounced.

Rap is to music what Etch-a-Sketch is to art.

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

No sense being pessimistic. It wouldn't work anyway.

Have A Happy Thursday,

Phil

Phil,

Great thing you got going here, and I really needed the good laugh this morning. The first joke about the farmer got me to thinking. Maybe you might have some gardeners upon your followers. I just started a new group and forum in the Family and Home Grouping called "In The Garden".

Always think of yourself as a cat, and no matter how far you fall, you'll always end up back on your feet!

Three things happen when you reach old age. The first is that you start to lose your memory. I'll be danged if I can't remember the other two....lol.

Facebook has a new "Getting to know you section", where others can ask stupid questions. An old friend asked me: "Dave what would you and Jean do if you were the last two people on earth?" So I replied: "Easy, we'd go to Bill's Little Bar and enjoy Happy Hour with everyone - er two of Us!"

My dad, always the joker. We went to a fancy restaurant, and the waitress came to take our order. Since he was the man of the house, we always let him go first. He told the waitress that he would like to "Sample the lamb special". After a second of total confusion, she replied: "Excuse me sir, but we don't have a lamb special today". He came back with, "Oh, I just wanted a little of ewe".

Just because they say that you ought to be married before doing anything indiscriminate, doesn't mean that you have to be married to each other.

I told my wife once, that just because there may be a lot of beef in it, doesn't mean there's any pork in it. I suddenly became very affectionate about there being chicken in my hotdog.

Have a great day all, this could go on all day....lol. Phil, again, thanks for the invite.

Dave DollarSeed.com

Hi David,

It's so good to see you here. Glad you stopped by to visit. I just checked out your Forum and joined in. About the only growing I do these days is fresh Herbs, and I grow those on my countertops, but I'll be sure and check out your Vegetables as well. Looks like you've got a good selection, and the price is definitely right.

Thanks also for the Cute Comments. Your Dad sounds a little bit like me in my younger days. I got my face slapped a few times when I asked an especially Cute waitress for my favorite Breakfast, "The Sheep Herder's Delight, that always included "a little piece of Ewe".

Good Luck on your Forum, and I hope everyone will click the Link above and visit. Looks like some very interesting information.

Happy Thanksgiving My Friend,

Phil

Hi Peter,

I'm always happy when you stop by to visit. Actually, our senses of Humor are quite similar, you've just got a little bit more guts than I do. Thanks for the cute Angels jokes. Here's a couple more that I like...

A Good Angel Joke

Just before Christmas God was looking down at Earth and saw all of the evil that was going on. He decided to send an angel down to Earth to check it out. So he called one of His best angels and sent the angel to Earth for a time. When she returned she told God, yes it is bad on Earth, 95% is bad and 5% is good.

Well, he thought for a moment and said, maybe I had better send down a second angel to get another point of view. So God called another angel and sent her to Earth for a time too. When the angel returned she went to God and told him yes, the Earth was in decline, 95% was bad and 5% was good.

God said this was not good. So He decided to email the 5% that were good and He wanted to encourage them, give them a little something to help them keep going.

Do you know what that email said?
Ah, so you didn't get one either?

Baseball Angels

Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?

In the big innings, Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel, and the Prodigal Son walked home. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.

What Does An Angel Look Like?

Angels come in all shapes and sizes; all ages and skin types.

For example, the little old lady who returned your purse last week.

They come disguised as enemies, teachers, students, even fools.

Like the taxi driver who told you that your eyes light up the world, when you smile.

They don't take life too seriously, they travel light.

Remember the small child who showed you the wonder in simple things.

An angel leaves no forwarding address, they ask nothing in return.

Like the poor man who offered to share his lunch with you.

Like the rich man who showed you that it really is all possible, if only you believe.

Remember the stranger who just happened to come along, when you had lost your way.

Think back to the friend who touched your heart, when you didn't think you had one.

Some cherubs have freckles, some have dimples, think of some with wrinkles, some without.

They are hard to find when your eyes are closed, but when you choose to see, angels are everywhere you look.

So, open your eyes and count all your Angels; for you are truly blessed.

Have A Happy Week My Friend,

Phil