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Judy Smith

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Re: What A Story - Your Friday Chuckle
2/20/2009 8:45:58 PM

Hi Peter,

I really don't have too many jokes to share, but the tineliness of this one - well it is right on!  Enjoy!

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House.  One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from  Minnesota.                                                              
                                                                        
 All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The Minnesota contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring,   then works some figures with a pencil. “Well,” he says, “I figure the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100                             
 profit for me.”                                                        
                                                                        
 The Tennessee contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then   says, “I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew   
 and $100 profit for me.”                                               
                                                                        
 The Chicago contractor doesn’t measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, “$2,700.”                             
                                                                        
 The official, incredulous, says, “You didn’t even measure like the other  guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?”                      
                                                                        
 The Chicago contractor whispers back, “$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and  we hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the fence.”                       
                                                                        
 Done!” replies the government official.                                  
                                                                        
 And that, my friends, is how the new stimulus plan will work.

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Peter Fogel

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Re: What A Story - Your Friday Chuckle
2/21/2009 11:26:19 AM

Hi Robert,

Thanks for sharing the French joke with us, The problem is that it is so close to the truth and hat makes it doubly funny.

I remember all the years I went to France for the Pret a Porter (sp) and had difficulties getting instructions in English either cos they didn't know the language or they simply refused to speak it. 

Things have improved over the past 10 years. Now you can even get a menu in English and in the past that was impossible. :)

Shalom,

Peter 

Peter Fogel
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Peter Fogel

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Re: What A Story - Your Friday Chuckle
2/21/2009 11:32:06 AM

Hi Judy,

How true and sad isn't it. It is funny though but I actually believe the stimulus plan will be much worse. Some won't even have to bid to get money. Acorn is getting I believe over 4 billion $. And the tax payer is paying for that. Disgusting.

Thanks for sharing with us.

Shalom,

Peter

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Robert De Merode

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Re: What A Story - Your Friday Chuckle
3/3/2009 12:52:15 PM

Hello Peter,

Recently I came across this “opinion” I thought very suitable.

Friendly yours, Robert.

 

An American tourist in London decides to skip his tour group and explore the city on his own. He wanders around, seeing the sights, occasionally stopping at a quaint pub to soak up the local culture, chat with the locals, and have a pint of bitter.
After a while, he takes a walk and finds himself in a very nice neighbourhood with big, stately residences…no pubs, no stores, no restaurants, and worst of all:

NO PUBLIC RESTROOMS.

He really, really has to go, after all those pints. He finds a narrow side street, with high walls surrounding the adjacent buildings and decides to use the wall to solve his problem. As he is unzipping, he is tapped on the shoulder by a London bobby, who says, “I say, sir, you simply cannot do that here, you know.”

“I’m very sorry, officer,” replies the American, “but I really, really have to go, and I just can’t find a public restroom.”

“Ah, yes,” said the bobby…”Just follow me”. He leads the American to a back delivery alley to a gate, which he opens. “In there,” points the bobby. “Whiz away sir, anywhere you like.” The fellow enters and finds himself in the most beautiful garden he has ever seen. Manicured grass lawns, graphics, statuary fountains, sculptured hedges of Apollo, Mythical horses and other beds of gorgeous flowers, all in perfect bloom.
Since he has the policeman’s blessing, he relieves himself and feels much more comfortable. As he goes back through the gate, he says to the bobby, “That was really decent of you… is that what you call English hospitality?”

“No sir… replied the bobby, “…that is what we call the Greek Embassy.”
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Peter Fogel

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Re: What A Story - Your Friday Chuckle
3/4/2009 4:19:30 AM

Hi Robert,

Interesting story to say the least. :)

One thing kept on jumping to my mind while reading it. What was he aiming at? :)

Shalom,

Peter

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