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Hello my friends,
Managing Conflict
Of all the issues that people tend to avoid, managing conflict ranks at the top of the list, along with public speaking and swimming with sharks.
Most people see conflict as indicative of a problem.
Disagreement feels uncomfortable and threatening.
When there's no open conflict we can carry on as though things are all right even if, really, we know they aren't.
If you ask people what the purpose of conflict is you'll get all variety of answers:
To get your point of view across
To win
To gain power
To let other people know they're wrong
To fight for autonomy.
Let's face it, most conflict is about winning and losing - getting your way at the expense of someone else.
On the other hand, if you're someone who really hates conflict, you might even say that it isn't really necessary because it causes more upset and problems than it solves.
However, there is one main reason to engage in conflict, and that's to reach a resolution.
Without resolution, conflict merely becomes an opportunity to recycle old arguments, disagreements and opinions: nothing moves forward, feelings get stirred up and reinforced.
Managing Conflict can actually be exciting and rewarding.
It can be a chance to get to the heart of a problem, rather than only focusing on the surface or obvious issues.
Most conflicts have core causes and once those are addressed, conflict becomes an option to choose rather than run away from.
Many blessings, kathy martin
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