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Craftie Linda

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HAPPY EASTER
3/20/2008 7:39:25 AM
When one breeds an angora rabbit with an Easter Bunny is that a cross hair? 

Good Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Easter. 
Bad Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Xmas. 

Altzheimer's Advantage #2 :- You can hide your own Easter eggs. 

Q. What do Easter Bunny helpers get for making a basket? 
A. Two points, just like anyone else. 

Q. What's invisible and smells like carrots? 
A. The Ether Bunny 

Q. Why did the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? 
A. He doesn't want the other bunnies to know tht he was fooling around with the chickens. 

Easter has been canceled folks. They found the body. 

Do-It-Yourself Easter Kit: 2 boards, 3 nails, and a martyr! 

Knock, knock... 
Who's there? 
"Ether"! 
"Ether" who? 
"Ether" Bunny!
 
Question & Answers 1
Q: What do you call rabbits that marched in a long sweltering Easter parade? 
A: Hot, cross bunnies. 

Q: What do you call Easter when you are hopping around? 
A: Hoppy Easter! 

Q: What do you call a duck that just doesn't fit in? 
A: Mallardjusted. 

Q: What do you get when you cross a chicken and the Easter Bunny? 
A: A good Easter. 

Q: What do you call a duck who plays basketball? 
A: A slam duck. 

Q: Why was the rabbit rubbing his head? 
A: Because he had a eggache! (headache) 

Q: How do bunnies stay healthy? 
A: Eggercise 

Q: What does a rooster say to a hen he likes? 
A: Your one hot chick!
 
Question & Answers 2 
Q: What do you call ten rabbits marching backwards? 
A: A receding hareline. 

Q: What do ducks have for lunch? 
A: Soup and quackers! 

Q: Why did the rabbit cross the road? 
A: Because it was the chicken's day off. 

Q: What do you call a bunny with a dictionary in his pants? 
A: A smarty pants. 

Q: What do you call a bunny with a large brain? 
A: An egghead. 

Q: What would you call the Easter Bunny if he married a chicken? 
A: The very first rabbit to lay an egg! 

Q: Why are people always tired in April? 
A: Because they just finished a march 

Q: Why did the magician have to cancel his show? 
A: He'd just washed his hare and couldn't do a thing with it.
 
Question & Answers 3 
Q: How do you catch a unique bunny? 
A: Unique up on it!! 

Q: Why did the Easter egg hide? 
A: He was a little chicken! 

Q: What's the difference between a bunny and a lumberjack? 
A: One chews and hops, the other hews and chops. 

Q: What do you call the Easter Bunny after a hard day's work? 
A: Tired. 

Q: Why did the Easter Bunny hop down the road? 
A: He was making the movie. 

Q: What did the rabbit say to the carrot? 
A: It's been nice gnawing at you. 

Q: What did the bunny put over his sore? 
A: A eggage. 

Q: Why did a fellow rabbit say that the Easter Bunny was self-centered? 
A: Because he is eggocentric.
 
The Rules Of Chocolates 
If you get melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly. 

Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want. 

The problem: How to get two pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car. 
The solution: Eat it in the parking lot. 

Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. 
It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less. 

A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy? 

If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you? 

If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves. 

Money talks. Chocolate sings. 

Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger. 

Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous? 
Because no one wants to quit. 

Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done. 

Chocolate is a health food. Chocolate is derived from cacao beans. Bean = vegetable. Sugar is derived either from sugar beets or cane, both vegetables. And, of course, the milk/cream is dairy. So eat more chocolate to meet the dietary requirements for daily vegetable and dairy intake. 

HAPPY EASTER !!!
 
Signs the Easter Bunny is Nuts 
10. Neighbors describing him as "a quiet loner." 

9. Removed from a department store last December after screaming at Santa, "You're going to die up there, fat man!" 

8. Can't stop washing his paws. 

7. Colorful eggs now filled with Prozac. 

6. Apartment walls covered with photos of Sharon Stone. 

5. Met with Dr. Kevorkian about the possibility of a "suicide egg." 

4. Rotting corpse of Energizer bunny recently discovered in his crawl space. 

3. Won't come out of his compound in Waco, Texas. 

2. He's hippity-hopped up on crack. 

1. Keeps rubbing himself for good luck
 
Why the Easter Bunny Brings Eggs 
10. Big tax write-off. 

9. Who ever heard of Easter Bricks? 

8. Consider all of the varieties: scrambled, over easy, hard boiled. 

7. He gets a good deal from the local chickens. 

6. Secret plan to eliminate human race by cholesterol overdose. 

5. Pressure from the Egg Marketing Board. 

4. Because if it brought bottle rockets it would be the Independence Bunny.
 
Top Ten Reasons to Celebrate Easter
10. You absolutely love the movie, "The Ten Commandments". 

9. You look really, really good in yellow. 

8. You just went on a low cholesterol diet and didn't want to waste all those eggs in the fridge. 

7. You figure any Holiday that starts with a "Good Friday" can't be all bad. 

6. You love to bite the heads off chocolate bunnies. 

5. It's a good time to check out your neighborhood church and not be noticed. 

4. You have this bunny suit you love to wear, but are too insecure to wear it without a reason. 

3. Even though you don't know what it is, you really like the sound of going to a "Passion Play." 

2. You figured since Jesus went to all THAT trouble to make it to the first Easter, you'd give it a shot. 

1. As a Christian you celebrate the resurrection every other day, why not Easter too?
 


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Re: HAPPY EASTER
3/20/2008 9:42:45 AM
Wow! We know all about Easter now. Cute.
Shirley Manion MoneyMakers, Shopping, blogs, fun places http://www.connectionsecrets.com/webmasterhelpers Shopping Bargains and Deals Connections http://www.connectionsecrets.com/bargainshopping Your own fun Iggly Biggly business for only $20.00 h
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Barbara Delgiudice

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Re: HAPPY EASTER
3/20/2008 4:13:38 PM

These are funny Linda thanks!

Happy Easter

Barb :)

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Sharon Lee

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Re: HAPPY EASTER
3/20/2008 4:28:28 PM

Hey Craftie,,,How Are You?? Miss you here..;-) Thanks for the Easter postings,,I will "Snitch" a few..;-) Have a blessed Easter my friend.

 peace.jpg Peace image by JennPfeiffer  

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Bryan Mcheyzer

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Re: HAPPY EASTER
3/20/2008 5:59:35 PM

Ha! Ha! Ha!

Good stuff.

Happy Easter to you too.

Have fun

Bryan

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