Hi, everyone Kathleen brought up this subject in another thread, and I think it's a good one. She wondered if other women have the same complaint that when it comes to a home-based businesses, women seem to have to discuss their spending with their husbands, while the husbands don't seem to reciprocate. Before I express my opinion on this subject I'd like to know what's been your experience with this. If you are married, whether man or woman, do you discuss spending on your business with your spouse? Or do you just do it? What's the result? Cheri

Hello Cheri,

I did not see Kathleen's forum about this, but found yours.  As a husband, I have never questioned my wife's spending in her businesses.  She has the right to do as she pleases with her businesses as I do.  However, we do discuss where our businesses are going.  We keep a plan for ROI on each one.  If that business is not meeting the schedule, we evaluate how to get it there. 

In the begining, we did not take the time to keep each other aware of the spending.  We experienced the typical shock and realized that we needed to keep a checks and balance system especially with our businesses.  It was a smart move!

Things are groovy now!

Joe

Joe, thanks for weighing in on the other side, lol. Kathleen raised this subject in another thread of mine...Who's Here and Why? I agree with your indirect reference to a business plan...once we get a few more replies, I'll pontificate. ;-)

Hi Cheri,

I don't think I really answered the question on the table.  I believe it to be an excellent subject and that all the other husbands/spouses should be aware of it.  I have seen many instances of control by both husbands and by wives.  It makes me uncomfortable to see this happen.  If they are friends of mine, I will speak to the husband in private.  I try to help him understand that we are all humans and should be considerate of each other respectfully. 

In my relationship, I always tell my wife when I spend money on one of the businesses or even for my personal needs.  I don't do it because she is a control freak or that she even asks.  I just like for her to know what is happening!   She does the same.  It is one of the 1001 ways that we hug each other.  R-E-S-P-E-C-T!  It can go a long way!

I read a story a long time ago and cannot remember every detail, but I'll try to paraphrase it here.  It helped me come to the understanding in the early days of my marriage not to control everything which is typical for some personallities.

The story was about this elderly lady who had just lost her husband of many years.  Her son was asking her what her plans were from this point forward.  She told him that she was not worried.  But the son continued to ask, but how will you take care of your stocks and investments and payments of various needs.  She assured him that she would be all right.  But he continued bringing up many subjects of concern and with great worry.  Finally, the mother calmly spoke to her son, "I am not worried and neither should you.  Your father was a great partner.  He knew that one day I might be here alone.  He did not want me to be left helpless especially in my golden years.  It was his idea that we would do everything together so that both of us knew how to do these important matters.  We helped each other do everything!  If you remember son, it was I who taught you how to change the oil in the car.  Don't worry!  Everything will be fine". 

I will never forget the impact of that story and how it gave us a comfortable zone to create a wonderful partnership.

Joe

Hi Cheri,

When I first starting working a home based business my husband wasn't at
all supportive.  He believe the whole online money making business was a
huge scam, although he never asked me how much I was spending, he did
encourage me to stop.

When the money started coming in, he changed on a dime and now encourages
me 100%.  Every now and then he asks me how much I lost at first!  I smile
and tell him that I've made up that amount an' then some, an' then some, instead of giving him an exact figure.  It worked!

Now we talk openly every day about what we are doing and how it's working,
and as Joe says, this is a matter of respect for one another.

Have a superb day,

Jen