Naturally, first impressions are a reality. I find myself making hasty judgments about others whom I meet based upon their appearance and sometimes based upon what they say and how they say it. When I do this do I risk dismissing what may otherwise become valued relationships? How can we be open-minded so we do not risk labeling people unfairly based upon first impressions?

My Friend Kathy, first impressions is a touchy subject, i think many of think , o my god what do i say or what do i do, or what do i wear? it depends of the who and what it may be at the time? you want to make a good impression on your first day of an interview for that Job, and you also want to make one on the first day of school, but in general speaking first impressions lose there appearance after you get to know one another. Being yourself is hard when you dont know the person whom you want to meet, so its really your call? The Value of a friendship depends on how you view yourself. think about it. I hope im not to deep man? Have a good day Kathy, and thanks for all your forums, its good for me to clean out the ole attic sort to speak sometimes. hahaha. http://community.adlandpro.com/go/tmobil8/mywebpage.aspx http://worldprofitassociates.com/default.cfm?id=102797

Hello Kathy,

This problem is one based upon fear. The only way to deal with fear is face it.

If we are faced with fear in the form of a threat we have usually time to consider alternatives, run or report or face it, etc. If we are faced with a charging rhino we have less time but have to decide can we outsmart it, can we outrun it or do we just stare it down?

When we are placed in a position of needing to trust we are suddenly faced with the unknown. Can we trust this person? Can we use the fact that they are friends with our friend? Do others seem to relate? Have I something this person wants? The list goes on.

I cannot give advice here as this is an individual risk. We have all been warned about somebody and ignored the advice only to find the information wrong. We have all struck up a friendship with somebody that we have been warned about only to find that we should have listened.

This is my personal strategy:

I do not wish to spend my life alone, without friends and cynical.

I want a group of friends that I can trust to help me as much as I am willing to help them.

I want to enjoy discovering about new people no matter how diverse their interests or needs, indeed I welcome them.

Most of all I need to trust and be trusted.

I am willing to give the benefit of doubt to the new person after having made an appraisal. If I have more time, great, if not I make a decision based upon the facts I have.

The main point is a choice of:

I am willing to risk for gain based upon facts.

I am willing to be hurt if I make a mistake.

I am willing to ask for help if I need it.

I will give help if I'm asked..

Based upon this I HAVE BEEN HURT, but

I AM BLESSED WITH FRIENDS WHO FIT  MY NEEDS of mutual support and I am not a bitter or suspicious person. I love to understand what makes people uncaring,  anti-social or selfish. They have usually got a problem of their own.

Your challenge is:

Am I willing to risk in order to give and get, It's as simple as that, but tempered with good old COMMON SENSE.

Love you

Roger

I've met people that in the past I might have labeled as no good or because of preconceptions about these types of people I had labeled certain races or people with tattoos or bikers or people who were dirty or homeless or poor or mentally ill, drug addicts, hookers, or people who had been to prison and never thought it was wrong at all.

But then I had an insight into this that I'll never forget.

What if God uses people like this in a way that most of us never even think about? Weren't they someone's child, someone's brother, sister, aunt, uncle, maybe their mom or dad? what if God is testing us and they're really kings and queens that he has set in places that we can't see?
I know that sounds farfetched, but if no one sees them in the light that He intended, as human beings who are in need of our help and love, and we are to see past the skin color, past the preconceptions and find out who they were, who they are and who they can be...like the ugly duckling turning into a swan...wasn't he already a swan?

Everyone is beautiful and worthy of God's love and we should love them and look at them with his eyes.

I've met some really beautiful people from all walks of life and there were a few who turned out to be millionaires...but they didn't put on aires and wore old clothes and drove old cars. I never would have guessed...

And I've met people who were down and out and had very little to give themselves but they picked me up when I had no car and gave me a ride and didn't ask for a dime in return.

Any person you meet could be Jesus himself..he lives within the hearts of people who you would never suspect...so don't offend them by the way you look at them.

Hi Kathy,

I think that being open-minded is a choice. When we judge others it says more about ourselves then it does about the other person. I always try to remember that each and every person is a creation of God in His image and that we can learn something from everyone. We are all equal in God's eyes. When you have the choice to be kind or to be right always choose to be kind.

Peace, Health and Prosperity,
Barb Doyle, Sc

Do you rise above the past and make a difference? Or do you remain controlled by the past and make excuses?
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