Chapter Four:The Way of Humanity 46 The Founding Master said,
“In teaching one’s children, the parents themselves first must not diverge from the Way of respecting elders and commanding the young; for, if in front of one’s children, one personally is unfilial, disrespectful, or does other things wrong, one will lose the dignity one needs to guide one’s children.
Second, one’s speech and actions must be grave and dignified, for if children consider their parents to be too soft, it will be difficult to teach them with appropriate regulations.
Third, one must give them intimacy and affection; for, if one is only stern and does not convey those feelings of intimacy and affection, one cannot truly influence one’s children.
Fourth, one must always keep one’s word, for if trust is lost, one will not be able to elicit the strict obedience of one’s children.
Fifth, one must be clear about reward and punishment, for if reward and punishment are not clear, one will not be able to bring one’s children to true self-awareness.
Sixth, from early in their childhood, one should imbue them with an appropriate mind of faith, for if they do not have it, while they are growing up it will be easy for them to be tempted by external sensory conditions.
Seventh, from early in childhood, one should encourage a mind dedicated to the public interest, for if one does not encourage it, the sprout of selfishness will naturally grow.
Eighth, from early in their childhood, one should forbid them to negatively criticize or disparage others, for otherwise frivolous habits will naturally grow in them and the gate of misfortune caused by talk will open.
Ninth, from early in their childhood, one should prevent one’s children from taking improper things, even if those things are trivial; for, if one lets them bring back improper things, shameless habits will naturally grow in them.” http://www.wonbuddhism.org/
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