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Craftie Linda

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Noahs Ark
11/27/2005 7:42:50 PM
In the year 2005, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in Australia, and said, "Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans." He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have six months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights". Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard.... but no ark. "Noah", He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?" "Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah. "But things have changed. - I needed a building permit. - I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler system. - My neighbours claim that I've violated the neighbourhood zoning laws by building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations. - We had to go to VCAT for a decision. - Then the electricity companies demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark's move to the sea. - I argued that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it. Getting the wood was another problem. - There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls. But no go! When I started gathering the animals, I got sued by an animal rights group. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. As well, they argued the accommodation was too restrictive and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space. Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood. I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew. Also, the trade unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with Ark building experience. To make matters worse, the Tax Office seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species. So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least ten years for me to finish this Ark." Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean, You're not going to destroy the world?". "No," said the Lord. "The government beat me to it."
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Lola Vanslette

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Re: Noahs Ark
11/27/2005 7:55:54 PM
Isn't that hitting it on the head!! Everything has to go through government "customs" before it can be made into reality. Sucks, though it is true...the government does seem to ruin it all for us!! Thanks, Lola A
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Re: Noahs Ark
11/27/2005 8:01:11 PM
Yup Yup!!! You know that it is so close to the truth that it isn' really funny. I am suprised that they haven't tax the water that we drink yet. Their already telling everyone what air they can breath. Thanks for the story. NormPoll
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Louis Pominville

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Re: Noahs Ark
11/27/2005 8:12:18 PM
Hi Linda, Being in the construction industry somewhat, I can really see the frustration of what some people have to go through. I was wondering how this was going to end, and again, God was right. Thanks for the good laugh, Louis http://www.give1get4.net Guest code 989519
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Re: Noahs Ark
11/27/2005 8:28:39 PM
Thanks Linda. The timing is awesume, as I'm having the experience right now. Blessings To You! Ann
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