Hello All My AdlandPro Friends and Family! Do you need help with having better self-esteem? Well, this forum is for you. Today I am going to give you Commandment #1. "Thou shalt not consort with people who make thee feel bad about thyself." Are there people you know who make you feel great whenever you're around them, who make you feel cared for, listened to, and valued for just being who you are? Are there others who make you feel guilty and inadequate, who make you doubt yourself, who truly would like you to be someone else? These people can leave you feeling drained, exhausted, and insecure. Healthy self-esteem is paying attention to how others make us feel - and then choosing those with whom we spend time. It may require courage to move from negative people, especially if they've been i our lives for some time. But letting go of others can be very empowering for ourselves. And the price of not doing it is to shut down emotionally, to have less energy, and to deny our true feelings. Choosing our companions wisely forces us to listen to our deepest feelings while watching carefully how others treat us. Sometimes, people appear to be our friends on the surface, and say and do all the "right things", yet their real intent may not be in our best interest. Other times a true friend may care deeply enough to tell us some truth that may hurt. How others make us feel is the barometer we use to develop discernmebt. Just always know that you deserve to be surrounded by positive, loving friends, and situations that enhance your life every day. Why do negative people exist in our lives? Because we invite then in psychologically. Since our lives are largely a printout of our inner-core beliefs, if we didn't have doubts about our own worth, we simply would not listen to others' negativity. Learn to recognize those people who consistently make you feel bad or uncomfortable. 1) Make a list of every significant person in your life. Next to each name, describe how he or she makes you feel about yourself on a consistent basis. 2) For each of those who makes you feel bad, ask yourself, "Does this person continue to serve a constructive purpose in my life?" 3) If any person oes not, then make the conscious choice to either transform that relationship or end it. If you cannot physically leave the relationship, you can at least emotionally distance yourself. -------------------------------------------- I know that you if have negative people in your life at the present time, and maybe that person means alot to you, it can be very hard for you to want to distance yourself from them. But in order to help yourself restore good self-esteem, it is an absolute must for you to do this. When you have negativity in your life in any fashion it will make you be unsuccessful in your life. So, if you are thinking of starting a business, or have started one already, you will not succeed as long as that negativity exists. Start thinking about yourself and what you want out of life, and make it happen! The first step into making it happen is to rid your life of all the negativity in it! Marilyn L. Ali