Wouldn't you know it ..just when I was trying to get out of doing a few steps, the picture doesn't show up. I just cannot get away with anything, can I?

When I posted this cartoon the first time, I checked to make sure it appeared and it did for me.

As a matter of fact, everytime I come back to this forum the cartoon I posted the other day shows up.

Anyway, here's another try. I hope it turns out this time.

Helen

Hi Peter,

We always knew that there was some reason it was so hard to eat healthy...

Fat Theology

And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow vegetable of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 99-cent double-cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with that?"

And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained pounds.

And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman might keep her figure that man found so fair.

And Satan brought forth chocolate. And woman gained pounds.

And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."

And Satan brought forth ice cream. And woman gained pounds.

And God said, "I have sent your heart healthy vegetables and olive oil with which to cook them."

And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter.

And Man gained pounds and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.

And God brought forth running shoes and Man resolved to lose those extra pounds.

And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2.

And Man gained pounds.

And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil."

And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.

And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour cream dip also.

And Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled in cholesterol.

And Satan saw and said, "It is good."

And Man went into cardiac arrest.

And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

And Satan created HMOs.

__________

Have A Great Week.

Phil

Hi Peter,

Here's a little more Word Play...

Play on Words

• A bicycle can't stand alone because it is two-tired.
• What's the definition of a will? It's a dead give away.
• Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
• A backward poet writes in verse.
• In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
• She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg,but she broke it off.
• A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
• If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.
• When she got married, she got a new name and a dress.
• Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A flat miner.
• When your clock is hungry,it goes back four seconds.
• The man who fell into an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.
• A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blown apart.
• You will feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
• Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.
• He often broke into a song because he couldn't find the key.
• Every calendar's days are numbered.
• A lot of money is tainted. 'Taint yours ...and it 'taint mine.
• A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
• He had a photographic memory..which was never developed.
• A plateau is a high form of flattery.
• The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
• Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
• When you've seen one shopping centre you've seen a mall.
• Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.
• When the actress saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she'd dye.
• Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
• Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
• Acupuncture is a jab well done.
• Marathon runners with bad footwear will suffer the agony of defeat.

__________

10 Signs Your Vet Bill Is Going To Require Financing

• The doc's thermometer registers in Fahrenheit, Celsius and dollars.
• The bill came with payment coupons.
• Your Doberman just ate the receptionist.
• "He has a very rare blood type. It's called '$$ Positive.'"
• He starts talking about extended quality of life, miracles of modern veterinary medicine and joint replacement procedures. You own a goldfish.
• They take away the blood sample on a sterling silver serving tray.
• The sad, pathetic whining in the exam room is coming from the owners.
• You suddenly realize where you've heard that low whistle before: from the plumber and the auto mechanic.
• "Do you have any idea how expensive hamster defibrillators are?"

and the #1 Sign Your Veterinary Bill is Going to Require Financing:

• "We can rebuild him. Make him stronger, faster...."

__________

Fimally: Another problem caused by deforestation...

Have A Great Week My Friends,

Phil