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NEED OR WANT: AN IMPORTANT PART OF LIVING
by Roger Macdivitt
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Need or Want, two words that (in any language) are amongst the first words that we learned to use. But did we? No doubt about it, listen for a while to a child or a parent and things will be offered or demanded by one or by both by using these two powerful words. Children soon learn the difference in power and circumstance between, on the one hand, the plucking at the heartstrings of “Mummy I want………..” which uses the human bonding of maternal love to great effect, or, on the other hand, the basic survival call of “Mummy I need………” |
So, what is so important about the difference? The answer is, a great deal. We all learn to use both need and want to get what we desire, and we start, at a very early age, to differentiate mainly between the desire of others to supply us with something that gives them a fuzzy, good feeling for pleasing us and the, more powerful, desire to supply that which we really cannot thrive properly without and that they are able to supply.
We start, as we get older, to confuse or even unconsciously misuse these words in an everyday way, for example I may say to my wife, “I am so sorry, but I need to work on Saturday” My wife may reply “Ok, if you want to” “No dear, I need to. I need the extra money to buy the groceries this week” “Ok I don’t mind, if you want to work that’s fine”. Do you see the differences on both sides?
This article is not intended so much as a lesson (who am I to advise?) but as a reminder to stop and think about the motives and the strategies that we and others employ.
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In Burma recently there have been chants of “We want a democracy”, and following the violent response, a change to “We need help in achieving fairness”, has been begged.
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In other parts of the world there are others like the Zimbabwe or Darfur people whose basic needs (not wants) are denied them.
So where am I going with this article?
“I want to be liked”, that is true, and there are a lot more like me at Adlandpro and in the wider world. “I want to help those in need” That’s true also.
Around this community there are ‘Wanters’ and ‘Needers’ and we should increase our awareness of who those people are. Sometimes those who appear confrontational just need to be understood. You will know those who selflessly offer their help to members here and the others who appear to do it for their own ends.
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Don’t put down those who push their businesses into your face but, instead, show by example that those folk who nurture and support, in turn, get your unconditional support. We don’t always know another’s needs. |
We all need a fair and balanced community in which to conduct business and we should all want to achieve that through the wonderful friends who support this vibrant community+++
Thank you,
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My dear friend Sam,
I am so honored to have this opportunity to review my “kindred spirit’s” article of Virtue: Need or Want: An Important Part of Living”. This article and your choice of Roger Macdivitt is why this forum is a recipient of the Best Forum Award! Roger and I have been Adland buddies for a long time, and we have often teased about being “kindred spirits”. After reading his beautifully written article I have no doubt that we are. |
Roger was very masterful in the way he wove his web. I want Roger to know that I feel his article is nothing short of genius. It is enlightening, in particular when it approaches the Adland community, and the “Wanters” and “Needers”. He has very fluently and gently offered his advice and opinion. And his conclusion that “We all need a fair and balanced community…….” brought the article to a brilliant close.
And, now, my friends, I need to hear what our vibrant community has to say about Roger’s wonderful article.
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