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Bj
Bj Burgess

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Re: Redneck Jokes & Graphics Here!! Share your's here
8/12/2007 8:06:04 AM

Hey Phil

Now this is redneck..........lol.    Thanks

seems I've got to go back and re-do my graphics, they didn't want to show up.

arrgggg!!  Anyway, figure this one:

Redneck Family Tree

Many many years ago when I was twenty three,
I got married to a widow who was pretty as could be.
This widow had a grown-up daughter
Who had hair of red.
My father fell in love with her,
And soon the two were wed.

This made my dad my son-in-law
And changed my very life.
My daughter was my mother,
For she was my father's wife.
To complicate the matters worse,
Although it brought me joy.
I soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boy.

My little baby then became
A brother-in-law to dad.
And so became my uncle,
Though it made me very sad.
For if he was my uncle,
Then that also made him brother
To the widow's grown-up daughter
Who, of course, was my step-mother.

Father's wife then had a son,
Who kept them on the run.
And he became my grandson,
For he was my daughter's son.
My wife is now my mother's mother
And it makes me blue.
Because, although she is my wife,
She's my grandma too.

If my wife is my grandmother,
Then I am her grandchild.
And every time I think of it,
It simply drives me wild.
For now I have become
The strangest case you ever saw.
As the husband of my grandmother,
I am my own grandpa!!

 

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Bj
Bj Burgess

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Re: Redneck Jokes & Graphics Here!! Share your's here
8/12/2007 8:30:53 AM

Hey Nick

Thanks

Redneck Hostile Farmer

A farmer and his brand new bride were riding home from the chapel in a wagon pulled by a team of horses, when the older horse stumbled.

The farmer said, "That's once."

A little further along, the poor old horse stumbled again.

The farmer said, "That's twice."

After a little, while the poor old horse stumbled again.

The farmer didn't say anything, but reached under the seat, pulled out a shotgun and shot the horse.

His brand new bride yelled, telling him, "That was an awful thing to do."

The farmer said, "That's once."

 

 

 

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Bj
Bj Burgess

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Re: Redneck Jokes & Graphics Here!! Share your's here
8/12/2007 8:38:28 AM

Redneck Garden

Redneck Garden

 

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Re: Redneck Jokes & Graphics Here!! Share your's here
8/12/2007 3:31:57 PM
Hi Bj,

I don't who's worst here, You or Phil, but I am hurting now.  Fantastic Idea Bj.  Thank you,






Bj, can't help myself. Graphics ROCKS!!!
God Bless Everyone
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Bj
Bj Burgess

1289
4768 Posts
4768
Invite Me as a Friend
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Person Of The Week
Re: Redneck Jokes & Graphics Here!! Share your's here
8/12/2007 5:43:16 PM

 

Redneck's pick up lines

1) Did you fart? Cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded? Cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea. I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card? Cuz I'd like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants? Cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you wuz a tree and I wuz a Squirrel, I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's only a
light switch away.

8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"
Woman - "WHAT?"
Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went inta this cheap motel room.

11) Yer eyes are as blue as winder cleaner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til afternoon.

AND
the best Redneck pick-up line:


13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it my
n*ts tighten up.

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