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Who needs a great paying job..
7/18/2010 8:24:19 PM

Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Person asked a young Engineer fresh out of Texas A&M, "And what starting salary were you looking for?" The Engineer said, "In the neighbourhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5 weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, a company matching retirement fund for 50% of your salary, and a company car leased every 2 years -- say, a red Corvette?" The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?" And the interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."

Thanks your Friend and Neighbor, Howard
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Phillip Black

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RE: Who needs a great paying job..
7/18/2010 8:48:15 PM

Thanks Howard,

Thanks for the smiles my Friend.

These are not really a jokes, more like just a little something to stop and think about...

A Great Retirement Plan

The American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican
village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the
small boat were several large yellowfin tuna. The American complimented
the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to
catch them. The Mexican replied only a little while.

The American then asked why didn't he stay out longer and catch more
fish? The Mexican said he had enough to support his family's immediate
needs. The American then asked, but what do you do with the rest of your
time?

The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with
my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village
each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a
full and busy life, senor."

The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You
should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds buy a bigger boat
with the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats,
eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling
your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor,
eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product,
processing and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal
fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually NYC
where you will run your expanding enterprise."

The Mexican fisherman asked, "But senor, how long will this all take?"

To which the American replied, "15-20 years."

But what then, senor?

The American laughed and said that's the best part. When the time
is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to thepublic and become very rich, you would make millions.

Millions, senor? Then what?

The American said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal
fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with
your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the
evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your
amigos."

_______________

Prison Life vs. A Full Time Job

In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell. At
work you spend most of your time in a 6' X 8' cubicle.

In prison you get three meals a day.
At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for
that one.

In prison you get time off for good behaviour.
At work you get rewarded for good behaviour with more work.

At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all
the doors yourself. In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors
for you.

In prison you can watch TV and play games.
At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

In prison they ball-and-chain you when you go somewhere.
At work you are just ball-and-chained.

In prison you get your own loo.
At work you have to share.

In prison they allow your family and friends to visit.
At work you cannot even speak to your family and friends.

In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work required.
At work you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they
deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.

In prison you spend most of your life looking through bars from the
inside wanting to get out. At work you spend most of your time
wanting to get out and inside bars.

In prison you can join many programs which you can leave at any time.
At work there are some programs you can never get out of.

In prison there are wardens who are often sadistic.
At work we have managers.

_______________

Wishing You A Terrific Week Ahead My Friend,

Phil

“There may be trouble all around, but I am calling you to a place of peace. Be still and know that I am God. Come to Me, and I will give you wisdom, strength, and grace for everything you face." Psalm 46:10
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