A teenage boy and his grandfather go fishing one day.  While fishing, the old man starts talking about how times have changed.  The young man picks up on this and starts talking about the various problems and diseases going around.

Teen says, "Grandpa, they didn't have a whole lot of problems with all these diseases when you were young did they?"

Grandpa replies, "Nope."

Teen says, "Well, what did you guys use for safe sex?"

Grandpa replies, "A wedding ring."

The manager of a large office noticed a new man one day and called him into his office. 

"What is your name?" was the first thing the manager asked the new guy.

"John", the new guy replied.

The manager scowled, "Look, I don't know what kind of place you worked at before, but I don't call anyone by their first name.  It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority.  I refer to my employees by their last name only - Smith, Jones, Baker - that's all.  I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson.  Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?"

The new guy sighed and said, "Darling.  John Darling."

"Okay, John, the next thing I want to tell you is..."

Published in my blog:  ADPressions

Thanks, Joe - they have me rolling - I love a good laugh!

Judy